132 : Happy New Year!

Happy New year my dears!
Kinda a normal day for me..
I went out, made a pair of specs, got my monash applications confirmed, had dimsum lunch, nap, then went out for dinner with family in tropicana mall.

During dinner there was an eye candy sitting across my table.
He was with his girlfriend so bohoo but damn..
A nice build guy and the way he was sitting, his bright red underwear was showing and directly facing me!! Hotttt...

Confesses to someone through a text...
Dint get a reply..
Do i feel heartbroken?..
Yea i do.. But ah well.. i'll survive.

Happy New Year to everyone!
2012!

Lots of love,
Last post of 2011,
Ck

Muacks!

131 : Individuality?

So many reality shows such as American Idol, America's got talent, So you think you can dance, etc, you always get a contestant telling everyone their life stories.

"Im a gay man, living in XXX, When i was young, i was bullied, then i was ....."

Like seriously?
You just described almost the whole gay population.

I dont know why people like to announce to the world they are gay. I mean why let being gay conquer your life and personality? I am sure you have a part of you that differs you from the rest. Its not like when you met someone you immediately announce to them your sexuality right? And it decreases your chances in winning indirectly. Not everyone is open minded and these people's votes, unfortunately, is taken into account for your survival in the competition.

Like the party i went to. John just started preaching about how he is gay and all..

Maybe im being quite inconsiderate on how i am seeing this but to me being gay is no big deal. Life goes on as normal..

Happy Boxing day people!

Long time since i rant..
Love,
Ck

130 : Christmas Party

Its been officially 26, almost 27 hours since i have last got some shut eye.
Yesterday, one of the legends from our club threw a Christmas party. It was an awesome party overall actually. We gathered, played secret santa, and 3 friends and i put up an show of the memorial dances throughout the year for the seniors for thanking them for everything. I got a red feathered boa and nerdy glasses specs from my santa. Random much?

Then the hard liquor came out.. Half of 30 over people got pissed drunk!!

Thank you host for starting the night with drinking games. I along with 2 others did not touch any alcohol for personal reason. At first it was entertaining, watching close friends get red and high, then one person gets drunk and others follow closely behind. There was a guy in the party i shall name john,  an open homosexual. John, tipsy, toke M's shirt off and they starting almost grinding each other. And then john licked the chest of M.. So much for being straight M? M then started hugging almost everyone and kissing them.

Avoiding everything happening inside, I left the house and stayed outside at the porch with my friend and we just talked for about 2 hours outside, we could hear the craziness and wildness building inside the house(They already had several neighbors call and complain). It was about 2am.. Suddenly i heard someone calling for Wing's name, screaming and asking where is he. I rush in the house and went looking for him. Wing was lying in a room upstairs. Shirtless, and vomit could be seen on his neck... Turns out he vomited on 2 sofas downstairs, and literally passed out. They dragged him to the toilet and then to the room upstairs. Later in the night, he vomited on another sofa while sleeping.

By the time everyone was almost drunk, most guys were shirtless, one just collapsed infront of me. M tried to hug me but i rejected him, putting out my hand and walking away. Then, when he finally got me, he hugged my legs and just screamed at me..

"CK!~~~~,
Honestly i think you are such an awesome friend...
But right..
I want to know, Are you GAY???"

I refused to answer, smiled and tried to pull away from his grip.

"C'mon!~ Just tell me la!~
If you are i can hook you up with a good friend of mine.
C'mon!~~"

Then when i broke free, he was quite pissed and sounded really angry

"CK!!!! TELL ME!!
DO YOU LIKE PUSSY OR DICK??
PUSSY OR DICK??"

He just repeated that again and again.. Sucks.. I walked away as a friend tried pulling him away..

______________________________________________

Okay, i shall just summarize everything by people.
1. Wing : Got drunk and vomited on 2 sofa's and a 3rd one later in the night. Pass out cold.

2. John : He tongued kiss the straight host for 6 seconds infront of everyone. He kissed M twice with tongue along with another friend..  Started rambling about how the host is his boyfriend and he had to kiss him again and again which Mr.Host did.

3. HM : Drunk girl that bite people. She literally bit almost every guy except me. A friend of mine's wound was so deep he had to treat it.

4. NN : Started beating people and screaming. Aggressive drunk.

5. KM & NT : Vomited dunno how many times. Spend about 3 hours in the toilet vomiting, passing out then vomiting again. I dont dare use that toilet again.

6. M : Hugged everyone and asked me if i was gay. Wonder if he remembers.

7. Iz : Got tipsy, talked to me about how she hates being drunk, got drunk, sobered up, talked to me about her problems then got drunk again at 7am.

__________________________________________

Seriously, it was a heart breaking sight. To see people close to you get that drunk and to be in that situation. I am not angry at them but just extremly disappointed at them. The whole house smelled of vomit and they actually broke furniture. Everyone sober was trying to control them.. A girl wanted to try smoking also but we dragged her away.. Just sucks seeing loves ones like that... Sucks badly.
I stayed up the whole night trying to get them to sleep..

The only time most of them sobered up was around 8am.. Waited till 11am then my mum came to fetch me home.

This will be the last party i will go in a while.

Yes i know, people will stay im so immature, dont drink, dont know how to socialize, Blah blah blah. But seeing how drunk and knocked out people are.. I really dont want to be like that.
I want to be in control of my thoughts always. I dont want my emotions to take over..
Honestly, im scared to get drunk.. What if i end up like John?
When Wing was drunk, he actually did something which i heard people talking about.
People started saying he is gay from what he did(which he gay is but very closeted).
I have no idea what he did but i seriously cannot risk being out when drunk.
It is the worst way to out to people.

Disappointed,
Sleep deprived,
Ck

p.s. Sorry my post is so retarded today. I just want to get everything out before i finally get some sleep. Spend the whole night taking care of the drunks..

129 : The chase.

The chase..
When you find someone you like and have no idea what to do..
I have actually never went after people before.. I am horrible at things like this..

You may skip the story..

The story
Recently i went out with a guy i have always fancied..
Before that.. lets rewind a bit..
Few weeks ago, out of impulse, i deleted alot of people of my facebook friends list, including him. Got a few scolding by friends, regretted alot but i knew adding them back would not be an option..

So last sunday, i got a message from him asking me if i was free for snowflake on Tuesday. Was quite shock that he messaged me even though he wasn't on my friendlist anymore. But gladly, i agreed. He told me he had friends tagging along too and asked me to invite a few mutual friends along but i dint. On the day, I went to sunway to met him. Met him by the ice skating ring, alone.. His friend said he will come met us later but never came.. My god.. He was so cute as most hybrids are.. Standing almost half a head taller then me, wearing a black shirt, cargo pants and slippers. It was the first time meeting him and we went for lunch together. We just talked about everything and he was really outgoing.

Went shopping together, he made a lot of cute gestures that made me laugh.. Toke a child's clothes a put it infront of me and asked me if i could wear it, wore a pink scarf and asked me if he looked good and toke a picture of me wearing a crown for fun.. He actually remembers my birthday too.. Throughout the whole day he asked me alot of question like if i wore odd colours, do i like these type of shirts, family members, studies etc..

Today i purposely went to lakeside so i could see him for a while.. Stalker much?

To say i fell in love is not exactly true but saying i like him is an understatement..

The Question
How are you suppose to let someone know you like them with no certainty that the feeling is mutual feeling? Just really curious since i have no knowledge at all in that field..  Texting will be kinda akward if the feeling is not mutual and all..

If you read the story : What will you do if you were me?

Just questions to fill the gaps in my thoughts.. Overall i dont think i will actually go after him though no matter how much i like him.. Im leaving to aussie soon.. =/

Curious,
Love,
Ck

P.s. Thanks for the good lucks. I scored 90.5/99.95 for my ATAR. Haha, not good enough for Melbourne Uni but oh well.. Imagine with all the things that went on during my exams, heartbreaks and heartaches and all i still manage to score fairly well.. Imagine without all the stuff that happened.. >.<

128 : Nervous!

Yes i have been Mia for a while now.. Havent been having any inspiration to write..
So many things have been going on everyday! Here and there emotional rollercosters..

Anyways.. I have been going out almost everyday and meeting new people.. One of which i actually really like... Dum dum dum!

Results are coming out tomorrow. Good luck to me!
Hope i get good results!!

Till i get something interesting to write about..
Lots of love,
Ck

127: Run Away!!

Run away!!
I sprinted away down the isle to Marks and Spencers, the closes shop that was actually big enough for me to go in without the sales assistance unwelcoming glare.
Heart beating in the ear, breathing heavily,  a nervous wreck.. 
I was panicking..
I stood behind the display and just waited there..
Looking out for people walking by the shop..

__________________________________________________

Today was a full day for me..
Woke up as early as i could, toke a bath and rushed to Sunway Pyramid to met a close friend for branch. Lets call him Wing. lol
Christmas shopping! Bought a yellow tank top and feathered wings for a friend for her to achieve her Victoria Secret look.. haha! I got 1 more outstanding gift to buy and gifts for family. You know who you are outstanding person.. Dont make it so hard for me to buy you something!!

What happened?..
I was sitting with Wing on one of the glass benches provided while waiting for his friend to join us for dinner.
Both of us bored and tired, was chatting away while we watch shoppers go by.

Then it happened.. I looked to my left..
I saw someone wearing black and red, the taylors college tee. My horrible eye sight could not see his face in detail but i could make out the black specs he was wearing.. KL!?!? KL always wore that shirt when i was still going out with him and he wore black specs too.. OMG!! It was him!! RUN AWAY!!!

"FUCK!! Why is he here?? Damn damn damn damn!!"

I left Wing sitting there confused as i ran away to hid.. Looking outside to see him walk by.. It was a mix feeling.. A huge part of me dreaded the thought of seeing him.. What if he was with someone new?? It will hurt.. A small part of me in the other hand.. really wanted to see him..

My phone vibrated.
Wing :" U bitch. Is not him lah walaoooo"
I walked back in shame..

Wing asked me something meaningful.. "Why must you be the one that avoids him?"..

Not sure about the answer...
Was quite down after that..

Flashmob again this saturday in sunway pyramid..
Dancing flashmob should be my permanent job..
Lots of love,
Ck

126 : Saturday.

Such an overdue post..
Last Saturday was such a hectic day for me.
At 11am, long before my usual wake up time, i had to be in college to met up with everyone. Had breakfast together then we were off to the flashmob client's office in Raja Chulan to practice our dance with the office workers.

After everything we were in the flashmob venue, pavillion. As usual the whole KL area was filled with people, but something extra.. Buddy bears!! They are such cute bears!!

The one that caught my eye the most.. Statue of Liberty! haha

Turns out these bears are by UNICEF to promote global harmony. Each 2 meter statue represents a country. I have to say, Malaysia, i am disappointed in you.. Our bear looks so retarded.. Refer to the first picture for the Malaysia's bear..

Do go take some time to go visit these bears. They are quite a nice sight seeing them lining up around the fountain and the street. haha

Anyways, the flashmob was awesome!!  Some things happened after the flashmob.. but im so tired.. Will blog about it next time..

Till then,
Love,
Ck

125 : Costume party

So yesterday i went for a costume party event organized by my college's A levels committee to celebrate their last day of college for the year or something..

I have never seen such a failed event in my life..

The turn out was horrible. For a college that has easily over two thousand people, only about 50 people or LESS came for the event. If i was the organizer i would be depressed..

The entertainment however, was good. With an awesome singer and a band that played, not to mention a good performance by the dance club i was kept well entertained. :D Throughout the event.. One thing caught my eye.. My friend's boyfriend.. My god!! SHE IS BLOODY LUCKY!! He dressed up as this undead pirate, with face paint and an a pirate'ish jacket, exposing his chest and rock hard abs!! Eye candy!! My friend had to tell me "woi, stop staring at him.." Oops?

They had tarot reading as well. It was some what accurate.. The cards says i dream big, that i think alot and is an artistic person. The cards also say that im often used by people, that i have to be careful with people around me and with the friends i make. In my future, i can expect a sweet romantic relationship, but be vary of lies and illusions.. True?..

Anyways. Here is a what i wore for the event..

*Pic removed*

Embarrassed,

Love,

Ck

124: Cat

3 days ago, i heard my brother screaming for me from the garden.
What was the rush?
A stray cat.
An extremely friendly stray cat that actually started purring on my brothers leg.
Since my brother and i love and always wanted a pet, a dog actually. We were petting her and playing with her.. 
Then it was time to go, we both had things to do..
Guess what? The cat never left..  She is always outside in my garden, waiting for my brother and i to get home.
Each time we open the car door, she rushes to us from a corner of the house.

The morning after our first encounter, when my brother and i was still asleep, the cat actually came into my house and went upstairs!! Was walking around upstairs and my dad had the shock of his life when he saw her around. She then followed me dad downstairs..

About an hour ago, when i was in my living room, the cat was meowing outside the main door. Naturally i ignored her, i played with her the whole afternoon and i wanted some "me" time. The cat usually just sits outside. Until.. she found out that she fits through the grill door.. ALL HELL BREAK LOOSE!!
She came in.. Walked over to me.. Jumped up the sofa and sat next to me. Initially i was like "OMG!! MY MUM IS GOING TO KILL ME!!!! GO AWAY!~~~"
And then.. something happened..

She fell asleep..

My heart melted..

The thing is i still dont know if this kitty wants to stay here permanently or just wants a hangout spot for a while. She goes missing once in a while and comes back afterwards.. Did we just adopted a cat??

Her name is "Hiao" by the way. For obvious reasons.. haha!

________________________________________

Another flashmob coming up in pavilion this saturday.
Haha, and tomorrow im going for a costume partyish event.

*image removed*

Hint on what im going to wear.. Can anyone guess it??

Till next time,

Lots of love,

Ck

123 : Crushes 2

Okay.. Kaylex kena cupid shot..
About time right?? haha
So now i am in lala land, floating in the clouds..
Drifting, fantasizing, dreaming~
Will gravity pull me down?.. Or will i float to my destination le?..
I wonder..

________________________________________

What is this? another post about crushes? Yes it is..
Kaylex has many many crushes but never pursue them.. Too scared perhaps.

So, an hour ago, i had a "liked" on one of my photos by a guy i had a crushed on in form 4. Totally forgot about him.. Haven't talked to him since the beginning of the year. It was a really particularly weird crush you might say. Very, very weird. He was the athlete of the year, a very popular guy, a gymnast, a taekwondo black belt,  a rebel that stands for his beliefs and also, a latin dancer. Whats so weird about the crush? I dint fall for all those, but i fell for his scent..  (Yes.. He is straight)

I remember his scent, it was a musky yet sweet smell.. gah!! I'm such a weirdo right?? Some how i just pick up his smell and it was addictive!! I feel so creepy now.. Last time when i sat next to him during some occasions, i would just lean towards him abit just to get the scent..

There was once, i remembered, i was sitting in his class during free period. A group of us were sitting down in a circle by the back door and talking and laughing away. My back was facing the pathway of the door and many people were entering and exiting the class. Suddenly i picked up something and just blurted out "Hi (insert his name here)!~" loudly before even turning around to check it was him. And of course, it was him. He just stood there, was quite baffled on how i knew it was him.. I really dunno how i picked up his smell when he walked behind me... Im creeping myself out recalling how much of a weirdo i am..

He dances latin.. So bloody bonus!!~ Once i was put in charge of latin performance for a school event. So naturally i called all the latin dancers of my form to perform, he was the only other guy. During between practices, he actually grabbed me once and told me "cha cha" while immediately doing basic cha cha steps, leading me along. (In latin dancing, the guy gives signals to the partner to execute the steps he wants her/he to do through little tugs and pull of the hand known as leading.) My god, i feel so embarrassed that i actually danced latin hand in hand with a him, and i was doing the girl's steps!!

Anyways, soon, as time pass and SPM approached, i spent less and less time with him and kinda lost the crush feeling. But during a study break when hanging out with him and another close friend, he told us accurately his penis size..   lol?

I still love his smell though.. Quite weird right?..
This is :

The weird story of

Kaylex,

falling for someone because of their 

scent

May it be published with more details and become a top hit seller book.. haha!

_______________________________________________

Thank you guys so much for your comments on my last post.. Was seriously down for some reason..
Feeling much better now. Adding the feeling of a new crush, Im super happy. Hope the feeling lasts?

Love you guys lots,
Till then,
Love,
Ck



Awesome song by the lovely Karmin.
"Who do you think you are???"

122: Flawed..

I am terribly flawed
I am not good looking,

I am not tall,

I am not attractive,
I am often a pessimist,

I am often too sensitive,
I am often bullied, push around,
I have low self confidence,
I don't have many close friends,
I am still holding on to memories..

I just feel so lonely now..
I want to talk to someone yet the little voice in my head is telling me that i might be annoying the people i usually talk to..
They have their own problems too..
I don't want to trouble them..

I want a best friend...
Someone that picks you first when choosing a partner,
Someone that goes everywhere with you..
Every best friend i had has drifted away..
Being in a different college with everyone makes matters worst..

I feel so lonely..

lonely..

We all want somebody..
When it gets cold, When it gets lonely.. :(

121 : Awkward Moment..

The awkward moment of sculpting the breast of women figure out of clay, with your mum right next to you..

Bloody awkward!!

________________________________________________

Recently i have been going for clay sculpting classes. It really occupies my time and i always had an interest in art. So, did the general body figure, hands, legs, thigh of a woman figure. It looked all good. Till it was time to add the breast...

"How big you want the breast to be?? Big??", my teacher asked me while holding a big lump of clay. How am i suppose to answer that? "Normal laa..." I replied.

Then i realize.. I have no idea how woman's breast properly look like! Sculpting randomly trying to figure out how a boobs suppose to look like while my mum was sitting next to me the whole time!!(She was taking classes too!) I had to face questions like:

"Eh.. Why so big one?"
"Drooping already la your boobs!!"

So paiseh!! At the end, my sculpted boobs were out of proportion and the position was out.. ><

The curse of being born this way.. We dont see many boobs..  I have no interest what so ever on how boobs look and how big/small they are.. If you ask me to sculpt a penis.. I can sculpt one for you!! Foreskin? Size? Erected? Veins?? Seen many enough to sculpt the perfect one.. haha!!

Hope i can finish the figure as soon as possible!
Till next time,
Lots of love,
CK


P.s. No... Im not going to sculpt penises for random people.. lol

120 : Picture~

Been so busy.. I want to sleep till 1pm again!~

Yesterday, flashmob for a happy married couple's anniversary, we were given costumes to create a fairy tail scene.

*image removed*

Here is the photo i promised.

Anyways, overall flashmob was fun!

Went home with wallet Rm200 heavier.. haha!

Till next time,

Lots of love,

Ck

119 : Hope

It was actually planned to blog about what a horrible day i had.
At 3am, i received a text that i had to go to time square at 9pm for flashmob practice instead of a dance studio close today because the client requested.
The client it rude, demanding and just a rotten personality.
Like someone said, respect should be earned, not demanded. Overheard quite a few people scolding him behind his back.. haha!

Anyways, due to the last minuteness of the changed of plans, I am forced to take the LRT alone from Asia Jaya to Time Square.
Usually when i take the train, i don't sit down. I can stand perfectly fine and I am sure others need the chairs more then i do.

So today, while i was in the LRT, i tucked myself snugly between the glass and the railing beside the door as i usually do. Anyone else does that? Its the most comfy place. haha! The train was fairly pack, all sits were occupied and there were a few standing passengers. My train of thoughts(Word pun??) was suddenly broken when an indian woman in her mid 30's got up from her seat when the train was still mobile, something that seemed odd to me since people usually don't get up before the train is close to the next station or at the next station. Upon seeing the woman get up, a young chinese woman immediately rushed towards the newly opened sit and sat down.  "Excuse me!", the Indian woman said, "That woman there is having a baby, give her the seat!". True enough, after checking around the carriage, there was a woman carrying her child. The Chinese lady embarrassed, quickly got up and walked to the far end of the carriage, allowing the woman with her child to sit down.

The monorail was crowded as usual and again. Right in front of where i was standing,  there was a man that got up for an old lady to sit down. And again, some guy rushed towards the seat and sat down. Baffled, the old lady and man just stood there stoned. Stupidly, The guy still refused to get up but squeezed to the side making a space big enough for the lady to seat down. Okay, regard that ass who sat down, we shall focus on the kindness of the man who stood up. 

OMG!~ I couldn't help but smile seeing how there is actually good in people. I kinda lost hope in Malaysia after the pass events such as SM get condemn by society.  All hope is not lost after all.. For me anyways. =D

Lots of love ♥,
Ck

P.s, Cadbury flashmob tomorrow (3.12.11) in timesquare! If anyone is there, come say hi to me if you recognize me! Im going to be wearing the most retarded knight uniform.. Will post photos after the event!

118: 1st of December

Acquired immunodeficiency syndrome(AIDS)

 Happy World Aids Day Everyone!
Today, we unite for those fighting against AIDS, straight and gay.
We dedicate the whole day to bring awareness to the dangers of the pandemic known as spread of the HIV infection.

Apparently reports shows that there is 9-11% of the worlds white population is actually immune to the virus (Bareback anyone?). Too bad not the asian population huh? Anyways, a man known as Timothy Ray Brown that lives in Berlin has been cured of the virus when he received bone-marrow from a donor that was supposedly immune to the HIV virus.
You can read about him more here.

Many breakthroughs has been made for the past years.
Scientist have claimed to come to a functional cure for AIDs by researching on Rhesus monkeys and on another note, a drug known as Truvada has been invented to help prevent individuals from contracting the virus.
Maybe with the continues research and breakthroughs, the spreads of the HIV virus will come to a permanent halt?
____________________________________________

Did you guys do anything special today?

I decided to wear a red ribbon and 2 bands for AIDS awareness out for lunch today.

Never give up, Never forget. =D

My arms look quite fat hor?..

_______________________________________________

Anyways, happy last day of the month! Its a new month and today i read a quote saying:

"December is the Friday of the year"

Quite true right? Hopefully this month will treat me with more love and happiness!

Happy December everyone!
Play safe, love more,
Love,
Ck

117 : Impromtu trip and A repost.

Today, after going to do some work for this Saturday's flashmob, few of us dancers from the same dance studio suppose to head back to Subang from Hartamas. We made a wrong turn!! We ended up turning to the bukit kiara toll and we were panicking for small change, we never expected to see a toll. After that we had to find a way to Subang Jaya.

What people say are wrong!! Boys are better then girls in directions?? The 2 of us guys in the car, including the driver were clueless on where we are going, the girl however, has a map drawn out in her brain.. When we manage to reach Subang Jaya, we couldnt find a parking and my friend, frustrated said "AIYA!! Go Sunway shop and eat la!!"

So random.. Then we went to sunway! In sunway, all the parking spaces has the little green and red lights that indicates if the parking space is available.

Photo not by me.. But you get the idea..

So childish of us. We spent 5 mins trying to make the green light go red! Haha.

Went for Carl's Junior for lunch and i paid for 2 of my friends.. Why?.. I have no idea. Remind me to get back my money.. During the lunch, we had an idea. To have performance. Will upload the whole thing the second we perform it for everyone!

On the way back, We got lost twice.. We couldnt find the car.. Went upstairs, walked around, Ran around, found out it was the wrong floor, went a different floor.. Wrong again.. Felt so failed at the end..

Overall, it was an awesome way to end the month of november after all the hell it has brought to me.. Hopefully the month of December will treat me better then this month.

Found this repost on my facebook wall today, ignore the repost thingy. Give it a read. I found mine quite funny.. haha!

Happy End of November,
Love,
Ck

__________________________________________________________________

Which baby are you?

JANUARY BABY
Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth. Stubborn.

FEBRUARY BABY
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexiest out of everyone. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest And loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Repost this in 5 mins and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match.

MARCH BABY
Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Great kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others. If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.

APRIL BABY
Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confidant. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that's caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize that you are very much alike in the next 2 days.

MAY BABY
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High-spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak too much in the next 4 days.

JUNE BABY
You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. a wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!! IN the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.

JULY BABY
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 days

AUGUST BABY
Outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. No self-control. Kind hearted. Self-confident. Loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. Easy to get along with and talk to. Has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. Likes talking and singing. Loves music. Daydreamer. Easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves to be loved. Hates studying. in need of "that someone". Longs for freedom. Rebellious when withheld or restricted. Lives by "no pain no gain" caring. Always a suspect. Playful. Mysterious. "charming" or "beautiful" to everyone. stubborn. curious. Independent. Strong willed. A fighter. Repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.

SEPTEMBER BABY
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. If you do not repost this in the next 5 mins, someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.

OCTOBER BABY
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all. repost this in 5 mins or you will not meet the love of your life for 10 years.

NOVEMBER BABY
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this month.

DECEMBER BABY
This straight-up means you are the most good-looking person possible... Better than all of these other months! Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Has that someone always on his/her mind. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. One guy/girl kind of person. Loveable. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves music. Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive

Repost this in 5 mins and you will meet someone new in 8 days that will perfectly balance your personality.

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116: Brotherly love

While in a restaurant waiting for the food, i catch a glimpse of a familiar face through a small tainted window of a door to a private room. There was a party going on in there. Being unsure i nudge my brother for the confirmation i needed. He looked like someone from my college group.

"Hm.. I'll sms him and see if its really him"

The second i sent the message, my brother confirmed it was really him with the sighting of another college mate, A. Excited, i decided to give him a call.

Ck : Eh Longkang!! Keluar!!!
A   : Huh?
Ck : Come outtt!!
A   : Wait ah~

A opened the door, looked around and saw me. Surprised, He then proceeded to run towards my table. He was so cute! Reached my table, politely greeted my parents and brother, then gave me a warm hug he always gives me. He was in a high school party and i so happen was having dinner in the same restaurant, seated on a chair perfectly angled to face that door. What stroke of coincidence right?

My "longkang" brother. The closest friend i had in college and the one i will miss most dearly.
He never fails to make me happy when he is around. Humble, selfless and a good friend.
Once, my parents got lost while finding a location near his house and A actually drove all the way from his house to lead us to our destination!
Yes sadly, he is straight..
Just really happy to have a friend like him. I dont love him in a crush way but a brotherly way.

Ahh.. I will miss my longkang bother so much!

Anyone else has a "longkang" brother? haha!

Love,
Ck

115 : Crushes

First of all, thank you all so much for your feedback on Melbourne or Perth! I shall ponder over it a while more and make a decision as soon as my results permit. 

♥ you guys!

_________________________________________________

Recently i was going through my picture folders in my computer and found pictures of my student exchange to japan 2009. Looking through them i remember i had a crush on a guy that was in the same trip! Lets call him "H"

One of the lovely streets of japan!

I remembered in the airport itself i had my eye on him.. He was surrounded by a group of friends, came across me as the popular type, chances of getting close to him was minute. Will just admire him from a far i guess..

No, he isnt the hunky build type, just an average build guy, shorter then me. I just

  thought he was really cute.

Unknowing how it happened, less then 24 hours later, i was best friends with him!! We chat a lot and really connected. We had many similarities, the way we think, the way we work, etc. Except for one thing.. He has a girlfriend.. Gasp, another straight one that caught my heart.

I'm sure most of you guys know about the public hot springs bathing in japan right?

Where stripping nude was mandatory, asset exposures was inevitable. Perfect playground for wondering eyes.. No, nothing happened there, but i did get to catch japan's national volleyball team soaking there. one word, HOT!! Freaking toned muscles, sharp japanese features and nice assets too if you may.. haha!

That aside, we stayed in a youth hostel. Each dorm had bathrooms that were like little public baths, equipped with a a large tub and 3 stools for showering. On the last night in the youth hostel, H and i were chatting with 2 other malaysian girls till late. By the time we came back to the guys dorm, most of them had already taken their baths and slept. So we both decided to go take a bath!

So awkward!! Stripping nude beside a friend! Any how, we both got in the bathing room and sat on the stools and showered. During that time.. i awkwardly got a boner.. a full hard on... i have no idea why..  I had to sit there for 10 minutes pretending to wash my hair waiting for the boner to go down! So paiseh!! What if he saw?? After showering people usually go soak in the hot spring water to warm the body. The second it went down i immediately went in the tub which he was already in. Gahhh!! Too bad he couldn't stand the heat and left shortly after.. I just soaked there thinking about my self embarrassment which thank god he did not notice..

Now after 2 years, we seldom keep in contact anymore. He stays in Johor while Im in KL. Another contributing factor would be i dont understand his written English since he is a Chinese speaker but cant read chinese..

Just one of my many crush stories i shall offer to you all for entertainment purposes..
_________________________________________

I have been watching victorian secret fashion shows.. OMG!~ The angels!! I love their wings so much!! So beautiful!!

________________________________________

Till next time,
Love,
Ck
WHY CANT I JUST LET GO AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE??? WHY???

114 : Choices..

Choices..

I'm not denying it, in 3 months time, I'm leaving to Australia, the decision is final, and somewhat compulsory.

My future is planned from the start, the day i was born, the planners had decided the path i will take, scratch that, the path my siblings and i will take. My kindergarten, primary school, high school, even tuitions, each guided and weightage of my opinions were taken to a minimum. I do pity my older sister, being the oldest sibling in the family, she was legacy in the family.  She went for classes and tuitions that my mum sent, and my twin brother and i didn't if my sister did not progress from the tuition. She was the experiment guinea pig if you may.

I look up to my sister, and i love her dearly..

But..

She is homophobic.. So are my parents but lets focus on my sister now..

I'm suppose to join my sister in Australia..
I am suppose to stay with my sister and my brother when i go to Melbourne to study. It would save a ton of money and can greatly reduce the pressure on my family's financial liquidity. Her even homophobic boyfriend who i secretly dislike might be joining us to. Okay.. get back to point..

I have a choice.. To go to Melbourne to study or to Perth..

If i go to Perth i would be free from any family pressure what-so-ever, i have been with my twin every step of life since birth and i would seriously love to have freedom.. but i would be breaking my sister's heart.. She has been excitedly planing for our arrival since a few months ago.. Finding places to rent and setting aside money to buy furniture. I dont have any friends going to Perth and I'm honestly terrified of going there without any support. What if i face an emergency? My closes family member would be 4 hours away.

If i go to Melbourne, i would have to stay with my sister and it would be bloody awkward. I tired outing to her a few weeks back and she has regarded it as "a phase" which annoyed the hell out of me. I have friends in Melbourne and I have my sister to guide me along.


Honestly i dont know what i'll choose..
I dont know if my given freedom of choosing a University is an illusion..
Will i have the guts to stray from my planned route?..

3 months,
Till then,
Love,
Ck


You are in genting now.. The trip i was suppose to go with you, we would be cuddling by now.. I remember how happy i was when you invited me to go with you... I woke up depressed again.. Wondering if everything that had happened was just a dream..

113 : ITS A SIGN!!

A sign from the heavens above that I shouldn't wank anymore.. haha!
First the curse happened and now this..

I actually find it awfully funny thinking back about it..
Its been like a week since i last did it (lost the mood).
So, yesterday night i decided to beat it off..
Went into the toilet which light were often flicking, was about time to change the bulb..
Got it started..
Skipping details, when i reached climax, right the second i release..
Precum flowing~
THEN!!!

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

The lights died..
Literally..

Cumming after a week in pitch darkness..
Cant even see how far it went..
So anti climatic!!!!

OMG!! So embarrassing writing about this!!

ITS A SIGN!!
Dear heavens!! I'm listening!! What is my next step?? What do you have install for me??
>.<!

Blush,
Ck

112 : Roses bloom..

I am extremely fascinated with flowers, roses in particular.

During the flash mob for cadbury wishes event on saturday, we were given flowers to "welcome" the contest winner for his special birthday surprise.

Okay, side track for a while. The flash mob!

It isn't really a flash mob, we had to paint our faces and even the emcee announced there was going to be a flash mob. So much for the surprise? 

Anyways..

*Image removed*

Tada!! Quite wtf right?..

So after the flashmob there were extra bouquets of flowers, and i toke a bouquet of roses home for my mum(no one wanted it because it was full of thorns).

Such a beautiful flower and it has thorns..

So poetic right?? haha

My mum was so happy and excited! The second she got home she started preparing the roses.

The way the roses bloom is just breathtaking..

The amount of leaves and thorns we removed..

First day..

Second day..

Today! It bloomed so beautifully!

Yes, i am easily amused, and often labelled as a mama's boy.. >.<!

Question:

Being you, would you love getting flowers as a gift?

Would love get your opinions.
Till then.
Love,
Ck

106 (111) : Free meal??

There is no such thing as a free meal..
Today my mum decided to go for expensive food to fictionally celebrate a joyful occasion -American express crediting the bank account with Rm250 extra.. 
So use the Rm250 to pay for the food? XD
I know.. Sounds so evil and greedy but cant blame us what... been years we went to celebrate anything. XD

So decided to go lobster man! haha, been 4 years since we been there!

They have crayons for you to scribble the tables!! hm...  what did i scribble?

Escargot!~ XD

Mushroom soup~

Lobster thermidor with butter we forgot to use..

Garlic lobster.

Spaghetti and cheese & Rice and cheese!

Complementary tea and jelly dessert! 

The meal was AWESOMMEEE!!

Anyways.. when we tried paying with the american express card, it was rejected.. Haha! Karma is a bitch right??  I burst out laughing and told my mum,

"See la!! Now need to pay with hard earn cash !!"

And now we decided im going to pay the bill with the flashmob pay im getting.. ><!

________________________________________________

Anyways, flashmob today was fun! We had to paint out faces and hands with the matching colour of what we were wearing.
I wore white..
All those who wore black!!
LOL!!!
They had to paint their faces charcoal black! EPIC FUNNY!! Will upload some photos soon.

Till then,
Love,
Ck

110 : Last time

This shall be my last time I'm going to blog about emotional stuff..

Yes, i have not yet go.. Dreams just draw my heart closer to him, the body contact, the warmth.. everything just seems so real..
I wake up tearing..
I really really miss him.. secretly i wish the feeling is mutual..
I still do wonder if i did something wrong.. To have made his feelings towards me deplete so quickly..
Seeing him with R everyday just hurts more..
Even when i was with him, R was always there with us..
R likes KL.. He actually told me before my break up which makes everything more painful..

I need to let go..

I cant take it any longer, thought that we were stronger, all we do is linger, slipping through my fingers, I don't want to try now, all that's left is goodbye to find a way to tell you, i hate this part right here.. I'm sure you never mean to hurt me, but i never thought we fall out of place. I wish you never looked at me that way. I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing, when a heart breaks it don't break even. What am i suppose to say when I'm all choked up and you are okay, I'm falling to pieces.. Dear.. If i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with my and just forget the world? Forget what we are told, before we get too old, show me garden that is bursting full of life.. Never mind, i'll find someone like you... I wish nothing best for you too. Don't forget me, i think I'll remember you said, sometimes it last in love sometimes it hurts instead. In another life, I'll be your guy, we'll keep full our promises, it'll be us against the world. In another life, i would make you stay, so i don't have to say you are the one that got away. I hope you see right through my walls, i hope that you'll catch me because I'm already falling, you put your arms around me and I'm home.. Honestly, if you ask me, how I'm doing, I'll say I'm doing just fine, i'll lie and say that you aren't on my mind.. I still love you...

The soundtracks of my days...
I'll need time..
I'll recover..
Till then..
F.L.Y.

Ck..

109 : Reality

Everyone has an ideal person in mind, but i was just wondering how many of us really get our ideal person?..
So far since form 4, i fell hard for 2 guys, both not my ideal, yet they were both similar..
Am i kidding myself with my ideal? Do i make sense?
To me an ideal guy is a guy that is perfect in my eyes, and totally out of my league.

Recently, one of my friend found a guy, not his type but he seems really happy with him.
Just really happy for him yet quite sad that im single..
I know.. There is nothing wrong with being single but i just really miss the warmth i felt when i hugged KL..
Just only today i woke up from a dream that i got to met him again...

Okay... I totally lost the aim for this post.. 

Anyways..
Prom was yesterday..
Performed a dance, went wild with friends on the open dance floor, and drop my camera and it broke..
Surprisingly, the only person that caught my eye was a teacher.. haha?

Too fancy?

Quite confuse with life's direction,
Ck

108 : The purpose..

This place is usually so lively in the afternoons, music blasting, people dancing, friends chatting, the perfect hang out spot.
Night falls and the place becomes empty, only computers and a dim light..
Everyone had gone home, only a few of us stayed back for last minute preparations..

Someone like you, Arms, The one that got away, Superman, Not over you..
Sad songs playing in the air,
My fault...
I was alone anyways, everyone was in a different room..
Just reminiscing about the past i guess..
Hugging ducky close to me, tightly..

Suddenly, my friend sat next to me..
She sat and listen with me followed by another friend.
I knew she connected to the songs..
Something seem to be bugging her..

She lean on my friends shoulder and began crying,
He proceeded to comfort her..
"nah.. take him", i gave ducky to her.. She hugged him..

Yup.. That is the reason i bought ducky..
To comfort me when I'm sad,
For me to hug when i need something soft to squeeze.
Sounds pathetic right?
I'm just happy that ducky does comfort people, not only her, but some other friends that are down.

And how do i take ducky around where i go?

Like a chihuahua? =D

Anyways, exams are over! My wings are now available till February.
Anyone got any suggestions on how to occupy myself?
So far i got 2 trips, 2 dance jobs and a charity job planned..
Clubbing maybe? haha
PROM TOMORROW~ =]

Love,
Ck

107 : Day Trip!~

Day trip!!!
Although sexuality merdeka was cancelled, a few of my friends still wanted to check it out the venue if there was anything hidden going on and i got invited to follow!
So anyways, met in college around 11 and we walked to subang ktm station in the rain..
My god.. The ktm toke a good 20 minutes to arrive.
First time using the ktm in so long.. The women's carriage is just so weird...
Decided to eat in KL central. This restaurant waitress trying to pull customers in was like "Leng chai!~ Makan sini la.. Sini sedap!"
Too bad it doesnt work on us hor?? If a cute guy did it.. then maybe i'll go in?.. haha

So anyways, we reached central market. It was quite amusing to me, i've been to central market so often and the 3 of the 4 other friends had never been there before. Like bringing tourist there, they started touching this and that.. A few times i actually turned by back and say "I dont know you, i'll be there when you are done" and "Dont Sakai Pleasee!!"

Initially, we planned to send the two straight ones from our group to check out the venue in case we get detained or something.. We dint know what to expect.. The place had a police in full uniform standing around.

Unfortunately, the place was closed, we then proceeded to camwhore in the old style lift at the Annexe gallery. Going up and down the lift just to get the best picture, haha!
Basically since it was closed, we just hanged out the whole day, chatting and joking away. It was really fun getting to know each other better.

Overall i was quite disappointed it was close.. If only the government would be more open about everything. So call members of the united nations and they cant even delivery basic human rights..

Was really happy seeing alot of my straight friends defending and commenting on the seksualiti merdeka "fan page" though. Its really nice to see that they are so many guys and girls that are accepting. All those homophobic assholes, why do you have to dish out the hate on a fan page? Why cant they just leave everything alone? Dont say anything if you got nothing nice to say right?

Since i cant make it this year.. Maybe next year?

Love,
Ck
Ps.. I dint bring ducky to central market.. i was scared he got stolen.. lol

111 (106) : New begining

11.11.11. 11.11pm

I shall dedicate this post to my close friends and vin. XD

Look forward to the wonders and mysteries that life has installed for you.
Close your eyes, make a wish.

Its a new day!  A new beginning!
Your perfect man will come soon,
You just haven't met him yet.

Wishing you guys all the best for the remaining year,
Ck and ducky. <3 <3

105 : I am hopeless

Yes, im extremely hopeless.
You create this barrier in your mind, telling you stop, telling you that you have been hurt, stay away, let things be, forget, let go..
Fortify your barrier, strengthen with steel, drill with nails and build with bricks..
Swear a bit.. Scream a bit..
Im ready.. I wont feel a thing.. Im strong..

Then i see you...
Cracks appear in the barrier, everything comes crashing down, into pieces...
Every single advice that people told me just vanish..
I feel like crying.. i miss you..
I really really do..
I miss your voice...
I wanted to talk to you..

People keep tell me don't let you get the satisfaction of having someone clinging on to you..
But..
I really dont know what im feeling..
You probably dont care..
I doubt you still read my blog..

After my exam i wanted to look for you..
But i dint had the guts.. Then i did something stupid...

Im hopeless..
Ck...

104 : Sexuality Merdeka?

Can anyone update me?
Is it banned? Or is the banned lifted?
I was actually planning of going for the event with a friend on Saturday..
Anyone else might be going? We can met up! =]

Love,
Ck and Duckie

103 : Ma duck

Its been so long since i spent money to buy anything just for the sake of making myself happy. So today, i decided to to buy soft toy duck.. since ducks are so freaking cute!!

Woke up early in the morning to go midvelley. My god.. The whole building.. i found only 2 shops that sell ducks.. Such a disappointment!!
The second i found the duck! I got so excited!! It was so freaking cute!! but i was a little hesitance.. Should i buy?? It was 80 bucks..
Then suddenly.. a couple walked by me, picked up the exact duck i put down a min ago and started checking the quality and all.
In my mind :"OMFG!! DONT BUY IT, DONT BUY IT!! PLEASE!! I WANT THE YELLOW DUCK!!!! TAKE THE BLACK ONE!!" (it was the last duck..)
As if my prayers were answered.. They put down the duck!!
Swiped the duck the second they left and ran to the counter to pay! haha!

Its just so cute!! With a small quote by the side saying "Give me a hug!"

Anyways! The reason to buy a duck? To



Cuddling my new duck to a nap,
Ck <3

102 : Mixed rants.

1. Children
Only yesterday i commented on someone's blog saying i really don't like little kids. There are super annoying etc etc. But something changed that today. So my Singaporean cousin came to visit with their son. Just a little boy around 3 or 4 years old. He calls me "大表叔". Haha, so freaking cute the way he calls me!! Okay, i was still terrified of him. What if i do something, and he cries or something??
Anyways, today while we were walking to a restaurant for dinner, being a little kid, he was running along the black tiles against the white ones. So naturally his dad told him don't go running around, hold someone's hand. Then the little boy came over to me and reach for my hand. AWWWWWWWWW!! My heart melted!
So after spending some time with "khai khai", i find that little children are an okay for me now.. as long as they are brought up properly.

2. Self Control

Resist the urge to sms "I miss you". Before the glue dries and is strong enough, dont touch the broken heart pieces.

3. Gaga
Lady gaga's performance in the EMA!! The screen shots looks amazing!! but.. I cant bring myself to watch it.. Each time i hear gaga's songs.. reminds me of him and how he loves gaga. I still can recall his voice singing You and I.. i cant..

4. Regarding my post 101

Okay.. few people says their appetite was ruin by the bamboo clam (thanks ooi2009!), so i decided to post some pictures of my favorite dish i ate just now.. XD

Sang har noodles!!

The prawn...

To die for!! The waitress stood there for a good 2 mins wondering if she should change my plate cause i was clearly done with the dish but was scrapping the little pieces of meat from the shell.. haha

The only reason i toke this picture cause i really liked the platting..

The most unique thing i've eaten tonight.. Fish scale jelly with lychee and lime. Oddly it tasted wonderful! The jelly practically melts in your mouth and has this tangy fishy taste but at the just right amount.. Awesomeness!!

 

Short and Sweet,

Love,
Ck