Monday, 25 March 2013

359 : Changing Nature

Puppy messaged me yesterday..
Undeniably, i knew he was feeling really down from his text tone.
After constant pester on what has been bugging him, he spilled when he was ready..

It was me.
I am the one that ruins his day without fail.

2 years of being the obsessive type, texting almost every min, constant need for their attention (no wonder i always got dumped), my nature changed. I used to get so depressed when I don't get a reply, or when they only reply hours later with short replies. Once bitten, twice shy, I've changed to a person that live my life without the constant need of attention from a beloved anymore. Numb from all the past, over thinking and the countless times the previous guys have made me bleed, I've became exactly like them, short texts and delay replies. I really don't know why I do exactly that but I unconsciously do. I read a text and throw my phone aside and continue with my daily routine, only replying when i get the urge to.

Vicious cycle ain't it? Someone that gets this delay treatment long enough becomes one that replies late to another guy and the cycle continues. I guess its just a brutal defense mechanism to avoid getting hurt anymore. Humans are so complex eh?

Anyways, puppy, I'm sorry I've been so cold to you.
I'm happy you understand that it's my personality and who I am.
I won't change overnight, but i'll try my best.
You wont lose me so easily and hopefully you won't lose your happy nature.

Lots of love,

I'm back. =)


  1. Leonut, I want to be the new you. Teach me how.


    1. I rather not lo.. I rather feel more.. ><