Wednesday, 25 December 2013

414 : Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone!
So.. I've to admit I've never celebrated Christmas before. Not properly at least, to my family Christmas is just a normal day with the exception for the young(er) ones going out with friends. Our house would have zero decorations whatsoever or any festive songs playing in the air.

This year was something different! I was invited to follow puppy for a midnight Christmas service. Due to some unforeseen circumstances however, plans cancelled.. He is going to Singapore tomorrow as well so I can't contact him till the 29th..

Ah well..


Puppy is obsessed over the song "do you wanna build a snowman".
To cheer him up, I doodled this for him.

Stitch and Puppy

Would build a snowman with you any day.


(Surprise I still remembered how to draw stitch after years of not drawing. XD)

Friday, 20 December 2013

413 : Is it okay to go out with your Ex?

Ex or someone you have dated before.

A huge debate sparked when puppy subtly expressed his unapproved when I told him I was going out with someone I had dated before. He decided to post a status on twitter saying how he is not okay with it rather than telling me directly, that annoyed me. What pissed me off that he did it only after I had told him I was going to sleep. So was I suppose to wake up, read it and feel like shit early in the morning??

So is it okay to date someone you dated before or your ex?

What most people say : Its your history together.

Nic says as well that you'll never know if the spark will ignite again, and god knows what will happen if the spark actually catches flame huh?

But to me, an ex is an ex. History is HISTORY. The reason you broke up will always be there and its enough to remind you why the flame was put out in the first place. Isn't it a waste to lose friends that way as well? - in fear that you might like someone again you completely block him off.

Don't keep love grudges. When it all comes down to it, real or not, they made you feel like you were the top of the world at one point of time. Isn't that what is life about, to gather memories to reflect on your remaining hours.

Insecurity is a put off. The first few times it happens, its cute, people say the only reason they are insecure is that they love you and they are afraid to lose you but seriously, after that it just gets annoying, that every person you go out with will be scrutinized and filtered. Isn't being together for 9 months saying something?..

I find it unfair as well, that puppy goes out with his ajay friends all the time and I don't say anything but the first friend I was going out with almost two weeks since I got back sparked such a huge argument between us. It feels like he can go out with anyone and I can't.

So guess who isn't going to meet up with anyone now?

All my friends are gone overseas, either UK or Australia, most people that didn't leave the country are busy with their own lives now. Everyone goes out of each other leaving you to feel like a third party to the whole group and a parasite to the friend you are closes to, them having to explain inside jokes and save you from an awkward situation or if you don't have one, it just leaves you sitting there drinking water while everyone talks about their own things.. Pitiful feeling it is..  Maybe ex's are really interested in meeting given our past relationships only..
I don't know...

Life back home is hell boring.. I'm dying to go back to Melbourne.. =(


Thursday, 5 December 2013

412 : The easy way out.

7 degrees out there right now. 3 of us cuddled up in the middle of Lincoln Square, our arms wrapped tightly around Jun as the cold wind pierce our clothes.

Life. I can say how lucky I am to have not experienced any death around me growing up but I can't say the same for others.

I cannot imagine the emotion flooding Jun right now. Within 5 days, 2 separate cases of close friends committing suicide hit her with no warning whatsoever. Heaviness filled her heart and we detoured from our way home to Lincoln Square to take a breather the moment she received the news. I felt to useless. That crucial moment where she was crying in our arms, I was speechless, or rather afraid to say anything. I don't know how exactly she was feeling, or the memories that were flashing through her eyes. I don't know what I could say in the moment but I was praying my presence as well as Rel's was enough to comfort her. The words sad cannot describe the emotion I saw in her.


The constant 'why's were asked.

Why would you take the easy way out? Taking your life thinking that everyone will get over your death and life moves on? Selfish. Every burden you feel when you decide to commit suicide just don't disappear, they are converted and passed on to your family and friends, not for a moment but for a lifetime. They have to learn to live with you gone, to accept that questions they have will never be answered; they will be changed forever. Seeing a close friend's reaction itself, I cannot imagine the reactions of their family members. They lose a friend, a sibling, a son or a daughter.. In the case, even a wife to someone.

To the 2 families to that lost their loved ones, my deepest condolence to you.

To Jun, please stay strong.. 2013 has been utter bullshit to you, ever single thing that could ever happened to you have happened and you always manage to pick yourself and stay strong. 'come at me bro!!'

Both aren't even 30 years old, one of them aren't even 25 yet..

"If you have anyone you suspect is having some problems don't wait okay? Just ask them straight up if they are okay. They must feel so alone in the world that they actually take that path out."

Suicide is never as option.

I pray their families and friends will stay strong when the autopsy results are released.

There are people around you that love and care for you, help is always around.. Even the blogsphere (although dying) have many cool people you can email just for a chat or a little pick me up.

Don't do it please..