Friday, 31 August 2012

282 : Lie

Sickening really.
Exactly like last time,
So often i remember you kept emphasizing and reinforcing to me, quote "I don't smoke. Freaking hate it" to the point i actually believed you. Since the start of 2011 i have heard that exact words repeatedly echoed to me, either directly or indirectly, always telling someone "I don't smoke one, you can ask leonut, he knows me the best" and i actually thought i did.
Like how penguin, you always told me you loved and miss me,
Meeting up with a friend that came over to Melbourne for a holiday, you asked her a favour to buy a box of cigarettes over. In front of me when you received it, without me even saying anything, you told me again how you hated it and it was for friends. Fine, if you took initiative to tell me without me even asking or giving you the look, i believe you.
and you had a boyfriend, and i was the play toy.
But yesterday outside the venue, you smoked a stick right in front of me, huffing and puffing away with that stupid pride in your face. To my surprise, i asked friends about it and people responded with how they always have seen you smoking.
I really hate people who lie to me.
Like what the hell..
Why can't people just be honest?.
You know i don't like people smoking, but you also know i'm not the type of person that will give you a lecture on how you are killing yourself. People do what they want, i'm in no position to control them. Its the fact that you lied to me that really annoys me.
Why am i even bringing such an old thing up?.
If you like to smoke, don't repeat that lie again and again in my face. Don't be such a hypocrite.
A lie is the one that ruins a friendship, not a habit.
Hate being lied to..
Something wrong with me these days.. ><

Happy National Day Malaysia!
Hope you guys had a nice Friday break and enjoy your long weekend! 

Wednesday, 29 August 2012

280 : Hi Chen Xing!

Busy week has started.
Week 6 and 7 of uni is hell for everyone.
Been only getting home at 10 something everyday to eat dinner, finish the next day's work, bath and sleep.
Assignments due soon!

Got home today and found something interesting.. Haha

Hi Chen Xing! Your puzzle of a lengzai completed!
Now to get my work done. =P

Merdeka clubbing tomorrow!

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

280: Happy Birthday Mama?

Today is my mama's 50+++ birthday.
I shall be a good son to not reveal her age.. Sensitive age issues with women..

So for the past few year we would usually buy a package from RedRibbonDays. A nice japanese dinner for 2 and all. But this year we ran out of nice packages to buy.

My sister and i decided on sending them on a cruise.. Little pricey but why not? It would be just an awesome experience since they never experienced the sea before. Unfortunately mum found out and she is utterly convinced that a ship, no matter how big.. Is a floating death trap.. Even my dad couldn't convinced her to go..

So we are kinda out of ideas.. I wanted to buy the same duck cushion i have for her but its not available online..

Mum says "as long as you are a good son, study hard and don't do drugs that's the best birthday gift you can get for me."
Cliche much mama?

So.. Any ideas on a nice gift for my mum?..


p.s. Was checking out "Royal Caribean Cruise". There is a 10 day package that starts from singapore to shanghai, stopping in vietnam, hongkong, japan and korea which looks absolutely awesome.  I wana go..
Been for one Royal Caribean Cruise before and it was a really cool experienced. Should try it one day. =D

Monday, 27 August 2012

279 : The "Oh i didn't see you" lie.

Walking around in the city, I recognized a familiar face,
Someone from one of my classes, not close friends to the point I don't even remember his name, but just normal "hi-bye" friends. 

Then the thoughts come.. :
"Do i say hi if i don't know his name? Saying hi would just be awkward, we wouldn't have anything to talk about and maybe he wouldn't even know who i am, our class is only 1 hour and we don't even social in class. What if i say hi and he don't know who i am and i realize its the wrong person??"

Then the decision is final. Pretend i did not see him at all. Don't know if he caught me staring or he actually saw me, just walk straight with a busy look on my face. Tap my phone a bit, maybe i would look like i am actually rushing for something, smile to myself abit too.. I'm such an awesome actor. lols

Two days later before class he comes to talk to me :
"Hey! I think i saw you at Lonsdale street last week, you were walking up right?"
"Oh really?? I didn't see you, you should have come say hi!"
"Maybe next time i will"
"Haha, okays."

In my mind.. 


Sunday, 26 August 2012

278 : Dramatic Much?

I know i have been guilty of this too but seriously.. Dramatic much?

Scenario 1

11 or 12 pm, status update : Damn.. Insomnia, can't sleep..

Scenario 2
Status update : Depressed.. :(

Honestly. its damn pissing off to see attention whoring like that. I always see people updating their status on their self proclaimed insomnia sickness when its freaking early in the night. When you can't sleep, try harder!! Don't go posting on twitter and facebook about how you have "insomnia", you expect people to comment something to make you sleep?

When someone says they are depressed its kinda acceptable. Its been transformed into a main stream word in the recent years.  Rather then depression leading to suicidal, people use depressed to describe sadness before suicidal.. Lol

Anyways, insomnia and depression is a sickness people are diagnosed with, not some stupid term to express your dramatic emotions. People who have insomnia or suffers from depression take medication and really suffer from it.

I had a friend in high school that really suffered from insomnia, 4am in the morning and he will still be tossing in bed trying to sleep. pity seeing him always so tired looking but seeing him get all A's in every exam.. fuck him.. LOL

Scenario 3
Status update : #Foreveralone

Bitch please la!! I have don't know how many people spam their status of forever alone everyday and they are freaking young! If you are 40 and post forever alone, fine. But 20's? Not even midlife crisis yet..
No comment lo..


Friday, 24 August 2012

277 : Power and looks.

Only recently i notice the link between power and looks.
Maybe not high cooperate companies, but at the teen level, the greater the looks, the more authority and command power that person will have.

People expect a leader to be good looking, to be charming or hot.
Just being any of those, people will show respect and become a follower instantly.

With a normal looking person, people look down on them, further emphasizing on  how looks run the world.

Recently a group i was a part of previously had ran into political problems, members not seeing eye to eye and abusing their given power for their selfish needs. In all that war and debate, i heard that one of the members, without the "looks" stood up and starting waving his finger. Being a senior member and all you think he would get some power but heck no. Everyone just went against him. I asked if it was because he had no "apparent authority" and everyone said yes. That's one way to put it but subconsciously i bet its due to looks. If a hot buff guy commands authority, everyone would be his little minions already, wouldn't you?

Another one would be my high school club. My friend was elected president for her dedication and potentials, but still, the members went against her.

Heh, when we see someone we deem ourselves more presentable we look down on them. Society, society, society..

I need my sleep.. lol..

Tuesday, 21 August 2012

276 : Twins Fact ll

Contrary to popular belief,
Twins do not read each other's minds.
Well, from talking to many twin friends, fraternal or identical ,we just don't.
I have yet to meet one pair that can, lol.

The mind reading thing is more like a habit.
Take for example, when eating something new, i roughly know if my brother likes it or not. Its like an understanding of what my brother likes and does, in a particular situation he know what i would do and me for him.

Like once we were at the dinner table, i asked him a question which he replied, nothing out of the ordinary, but only after dinner then my family asked us what we were talking about. Apparently we were mumbling the whole time and no one understood us.. Secret language achieved!! Often without noticing we don't have to complete our sentences for us to understand each other.. Lols. One word understanding of a thousand things.

Really funny how opposites my brother and I are. We both have a common interest of art but different brunches. Like he prefers sketching while i prefer watercolour, he prefers drawing rough edges while mine, smooth edges, even our sculpting techniques are different. Biggest differences is i dance while he plays music.  lol, he has two left feet and I'm practically tone deaf. Everyone says he should play something while i dance. :P

Having a twin, i just wanna say you people with twin fetish, YOU NASTY!! Lol. And no, i don't know or rather not want to know if my bro is gay, don't go telling me statistics of chances he is.. lol

That's all the questions most people ask me so far..

Any twins out there reading this?
Lol, i would like to know you.. Can chit chat experiences.
Can email me?.. :P


Sunday, 19 August 2012

275 : Twins Fact l

Disclaimer : Totally based on my own experiences. 

Beginning of a new semester,
more people are finding out and asking me all the same questions i have received since young.
So i decided to write this.

There are 2 type of twins.
Identical and fraternal twins.
Some old Chinese folks call twins with different gender as "龍鳳胎 (Dragon and Phoenix)" which i find a really cool name. So far i only know one pair of different gender twins and it so happens he is a blogger too. Do you know who? lol.

-Anyways, I am a fraternal meaning I look nothing like my brother. Literally. Its really funny how when I tell people i have a twin they gasp in horror followed by "OMG!! DID I WAVE TO THE WRONG PERSON??". Every feature we have is different, but people tell us our nose is similar.. Among so many things we both have a weird looking nose..

-Unless you are a twin yourself, please don't go calling twins and say "Eh, where is your other half?". I seriously don't appreciate you calling my brother my 'other half', which other twins i know agree too.

-Having a twin feels normal.. Everyone asks if having a twin is cool and all but for me i guess it feels like a normal brother to me just that we study the same things at the same time. Maybe its because we look nothing like each other I don't get the enjoy the perks of pranks. A lot of my identical twin friends play pranks on people like going to each other's classes for a day and such but even identical people says it feels normal to them.. Comparing homework and assignments is a good perk though..

-Another thing about being a fraternal twin, I don't like spending too much time with my brother and vice versa. We like our alone time and own friends. There are only a few overlapping of friends between me and my brother, his friends seldom talk to me and mine to him.. We spend time at home but in school and uni we seldom do. But i seriously do enjoy spending time with my brother though, makes me feel family warmth in some ways.

To Be Continued.. 

Saturday, 18 August 2012

274 : That Bitch

Karma is a bitch.
Don't tell yourself : Oh, i always do good deeds, i helped old ladies cross the roads, scratch a dog's butt, open a door for someone or freed the zoo animals etc ; that bad stuff won't get me, that karma won't effect me.
HECK NO!! That bitch will hunt down every single little bad thing you ever have or might have done weather you know it or not and punish you for it regardless of how many good deeds you do.

Stepped on an ant? Someone gonna step on your toe..
Call someone fat? You gonna get fat..
Ate the last cookie? Diabetes...

That bitchy bitchy karma picking the bones from an egg (Chinese proverb) and doing her best to make you realize your mistakes, soon or later, everyone one of them..

What i unintentionally did  to someone is happening to me, each character playing the exact same role but in reverse. Second time karma has bite me on my bubble butt this year and it works in making me go "OMG! WHAT HAVE I DONE BEFORE??".

So karma.. That bitch mama that i have a love/hate relationship with..
Making realize what an evil evil little person i have been..
Oh well.. Better then no relationship right?

And no.. no bubble butt.. yet. :3


Friday, 17 August 2012

273 : Change

With a snap of a finger people just change.

Out of no where, someone close to me became such a money minded person.
Every little petty amount i owe him has to be paid back to the cent, disregarding everything single thing i have helped him with. Helping someone move from one house to another isn't exactly a 'it's convenient for me' thing that people just agree to do. Its never convenient for anyone and it ate up almost 2 of my free days. Shopping with him he steals my coins since he don't carry coins with him. Sure, if its Malaysia i would gladly spur out all my coins to you, those 50sen, 20sen coins don't really have a high purchasing value anyways, most people give them away ; but 2$ and 1$ coins here are my favourite! Those small 2cm diameter gold 2$ coins are a heaven to use! Anyways i never once ask them back,. Maybe i should next time.

"Eh! Leonut, you still owe me 10$ right?"
"Since when?"
"There that time we went out drinking"
"I payed for your dinner that day.."
"Oh yea! So that means you owe me 6$ la. Help me order the cake"
"You no mouth to order ah? The waiter is right next to you"
"You just help me order la!!"
"Fine, what ever."

Just freaking annoying. Why the hell must i order for him when he can tell me what his order is, wouldn't it be more efficient if he just told the waiter? Right after he finished, he had to leave earlier and just got up and left. And of course this meant that i was paying for him.

He wanted to pierce his ear and he insisted i gave him one of my earring for him to wear since buying an earring here was "expensive". Rich man's son that just got back 7k$ in deposit can't afford to buy a pair of earrings. He even ran through all my earrings asking me to give him one or the other when i told him a firm "no". At the end i gave in and now he has my earring.. 

Its like literally every week he goes clubbing now and he said proudly himself that he goes to the casino every Sunday to "earn money".

Kinda sucks to see someone you really care about going back to his old stupid ways of clubbing and partying. Getting a dirt poor average tertiary score that even the worst universities won't even accept him into their degree program only snapped him back to his senses for 8 months i guess.

All these started when he switched his uni... New friends i guess?

"Change is the only constant in life."

Or maybe i have changed?..

Monday, 13 August 2012

272 : Text

When you decide to stop texting me just let me know k?
Don't fucking reply once and ignore me when i reply you.

Just tell it to my face : "Leonut, you are damn boring to talk to, i have better things to do."

I would seriously appreciate that rather then me waiting for you to reply.
And don't go "Oh! Leonut!! I miss you so much!!!" then stop replying.
Just fucking bull crap!!

If you are busy, tell me you are busy!!
If you have better people to talk to, tell me.

I'm sick of this.

P.s. I'm not referring solely to one person. It's generally everyone. Best friends, friends, etc. reply once and no more. 

Sunday, 12 August 2012

271 : Tired..

Came back home from dance..
Don't even know if i past my auditions, screwed up as usual...
Sat down facing my laptop and I'm here..
Tears rolling down my cheek, dripping off my chin, darkening the colour of my jacket upon contact..

I'm just tired...

There is just this feeling that i feel everyday..
A feeling of emptiness waiting to be filled by a presence,
Of love perhaps? of warmth and affection only a hug by someone special can give.
or maybe jealously..
Of what so many people have found which my every attempt just ended so pathetically..
I can't tell..
It's just a feeling of something out of place..

Assignments piling up, date dues drawing near..
Knowledge I'm suppose to know in classes just aren't there..

I joined dance to escape all the stress and worries but it manage to catch up with me.
Asked to help choreograph and partnerwork dance with no partner..
The stress of not meeting their high standards etc..
My brain isn't delivering like it suppose to me..

Been procrastinating everything..
What am i doing with my life la?..

I want to go home..

Saturday, 11 August 2012

270 : Peter Pan

Was watching Peter Pan today.

At the end of the movie,
Wendy said :

"Oh, mother, We are back! All except the lost boys, they weren't quite ready ; to grow up! That's why they went back to Never Land ; But i am ; to grow up!"


Really got me thinking..
I am hell not ready to grow up..

I really don't have much to look forward to in the future..
It's not like i can get married, have my own child and all that..
I got my education part already laid out on a silver platter and yet I am really not looking forward to see what i will be doing in 5 years time..

And people say surrogate mother and all that but..
Whose sperm?.. Yours or your partner's?
And if you get two child with both your own sperm and partner's with same mother..
That's the fear of them not getting along and bias'ness and all that..

Been thinking of the future alot lately..
About where i will be, who* i will be with etc..

I'm thinking too much for my age..


Thursday, 9 August 2012

268 : Greetings

Many ways you can greet a person.

The Hand Shakes
The most formal way you can greet a new acquaintance. Holding the person's hand with a firm grip with a stern "shake", to convey respect to the other person. Don't go giving your hand like you have some golden zombie princess hand, no crap energy whats-so-ever like you are force to. Most pissing off is when that person just brushes the palm of your hand when you want to shake their hand as a formality. Next thing I'm going to greet you with my hand wide open full force against your face!

The Hugs
My favourite way of greeting someone. Nothing like a warm hug to warm both souls! It kinda became a practice to me to hug close friends no matter how often i see them.. Lol

The hand wave
5 fingers extended and palm wide open, waving your hand frantically to attract the attention of the unexpected person to greet them. I have a few friends that love to wave when you see them, no matter how close by.. Even when standing an arms length apart they will still wave excitedly to my face with a big smile of their face saying "HIIIIIIII!!!~~~". It sounds really stupid but its actually really fun to do. haha!
Also another way by lifting your hand just slightly to acknowledge they other person. :)

The Body Contact
Any form of body contact. An arm over the shoulder, a fist bump, a chest bump, a belly bump, or an ass slap.. People have their own unique way of expressing themselves with a little body contact.

The Fucker
The bloody ass fucker that says hi to you only when you greet them because they think they are all mighty and you are unworthy. Most insincere nut cases in the world. And when you do greet them, they say "hi" with the most dead tone and look away right after or just plain ignore you. Seriously? My friend and i greeted a guy from my college class in uni a few days ago and he just walked away. Like seriously wtf. Thinks he is so muscular buying tight clothes but all he has is his man boobs to be cupped like a bra he solely deserves to wear from all the tight clothes he is wearing.

The Others
Kissing?.. lol


Just a few ways of greeting someone.
The fucker is annoying the shit out of me..

How do you greet someone?


Wednesday, 8 August 2012

268 : Anuptaphobia

Anuptaphobia Noun
1. The Fear of staying single.
There are few types of people, 
People who are :
-Looking for a partner, 
-Looking for a sex partner,
-Waiting patiently for a miracle,
-Happily attached, and,
-Not so loyally attached.. 

Not exactly a phobia I have but as many of us in the plu world who are not looking for a one night of lustful fun, I'm waiting for a miracle.. Lol

Isn't Bellatrix just Sexy??
Was talking to a close friend a few weeks back and somehow we ended up making a promise to each other.
Like Snape and Narcissa making their life bond promise,
Assuming our market value deprecation leaves us with a near minimum netbook market value in 11 years,
We agreed if we are still single by the age of 30, 
We would get together.. Lol

Quite funny now I think about it, yet scary at the same time..
Wonder where everyone will be in 10 years time.
What i will be doing, will I enjoy work etc..

The future is scary isn't it?..


Tuesday, 7 August 2012

267 : A friend

Meet M beginning of last year during orientation day.
Few guys on the stage and he stood out as the big buffed sized one.
I joined the club and later learned that he was of high influencing power in that club.

Charming smile and an outgoing personality,
He was instantly liked and respected by everyone.

Before I came here for studies,
My friend wanted me to come out to M..
I don't know why she was so excited, or using M's fav words, sexcited. She set up everything, made us sit down and me opposite him across the small coffee table. She sat in the middle of us looking at both of us, fidgeting impatiently.
When i told him, his reply was "Oh. Could have guessed already la".
He was really cool with it and we went to buy stationary together, talking about things he wanted to know and about his gay friends.

He actually promised me to hook me up with his friend if I told him I was gay during the Christmas party.. Wonder is the offer still up, or was it only valid during his drunk state, either way.. I'm too embarrassed to ask..

Anyways, its quite funny at times, i don't know is it intentional but he often forgets about my sexuality. Few weeks ago he mention ordering a Mail Order Bride for me.. But boobs just ain't my thing i guess.. Got to have a firm chest and a penis (firm or not) for me.. Hahaha

He is just the type of person that i can always have a heart to heart with. That day he offered to walk me back to my home to get my passport so i could enter the casino. Really nice of him eh?

Now he wants me to have collaboration with him for a project and I am freaking out!! If i don't meet his standard or other people's standard.. I feel so pressured yet sexited to be working with him.. He told me he really believes that i can do it.. First person to have so much hope in me..
The stress!! >.<

No, i do not have a crush on him..
But i can say he is really hug-gable..

Just a random post to appreciate him..
I should do this more often to thank people for being them.. =D


Monday, 6 August 2012

266 : 2 Types of Parties

Been so busy these few days that i hardly even spend time at home besides sleeping anymore..
Had two parties last week, a drunk party & games party.


The drunk party was spontaneous.
After a club meeting on a thursday evening, the committee members went to have dinner together (Just note that the brunch manager of the Papparich i went to looks like Jaychau but hotter.. Will get a pic one day). After the dinner the president decided it would be a good idea to have a drinking session at his place on a Thursday night and surprisingly, class or no class on the next day, a lot of us followed up with his plan.

Bought liquor from the local store and the drinking games started.
First girl to K.O, she took out her phone and started showing people pictures of her cat, domokun and fish, which someone proceeded to ask her had she ate her fish for breakfast, her reply, "Not Yet".
First time getting tipsy, everything seemed like a good idea.. The xbox wasn't loading and i was up front pressing the "continue" button on the TV screen thinking it was touch screen.. Followed up with replying group whatsapp messages and tipsy texting to someone.. I'm sorry to the guy that received my text... :(

Everyone did stupid things and only one person vomited..
Compared to the Christmas Party last year, this was seem so mild.. Lol


Apparently another group of friends planned a buffet dinner and party for my friend's birthday on Saturday during my tipsy session and i didn't remember reading anything..

Saturday itself someone wrote the attendance list on whatsapp and i went "O.o.. am i suppose to be somewhere right now..?".. And i had to be at the casino for dinner in 30 mins.. When i met new people they were "so you the drunk guy that texted all those stuff.." Embarrassing..

Rush to iron my shirt and made it on time.
After dinner, i watched my friends lose or gain money, then we went to my friend's house at 10pm.

Played Charades. I was so mean, we made M do all the funniest actions for his team members to guess, 'Kim possible' and 'Fergelicous'

Imagine a really muscular guy putting a sharp boobs gesture on his chest over and over a gain trying to imitate Kim Possible's sharp boobs or trying to make people guess her song 'call me beep me if you want to reach me', just to have everyone scream "CALL ME MAYBE??"..
We then made him snap his finger and act all sexy with "Fegelicious"..

Can't find those moves anywhere else but Cherades..  lol

Ended the party with 3 hours of Mafia till 4am.. Went back to the casino for drinks and then proceeded home..
Got screamed at by drunks on my way home, scary shit but i guess that's what i get for walking back alone at 4 something.. Thank god they weren't hostile..


Anyways, just two really differnt types of party i went to.
Prefer to be at the second one.. everyone was playing games and laughing together.
Quality time with friends. =D

Happy Monday Blues


Wednesday, 1 August 2012

265 : Stepping on Heads

Its been only my second class, unfamiliar faces fill the dance studio as everyone claim's their own spot facing the mirror. Glares were directed towards me, the odd one out, mostly through the full length mirrors. Could be because everyone was wearing grey, black or white and i was wearing bright blood red too.. Who knows?.. lol..

The night before Lex called me, asking me if i would help him choreograph his urban style piece as he needed help with partner work. I gladly agreed, been ages since I did partnerwork.

Still rusty from the 7 months break, was trying to keep up with the Lex's signature fast and unique choreography, which also includes his fav hip trust and body rolls, he knows he is sexy. :P
I made a mistake along the way and Lex stopped the class to correct me..
And then it happened..

"Oh! By the way, everybody, this is Leonut, he will be my co-choreographer for the next performance piece we will learn soon, say hi!"

OMG!! Its like people have been here since the beginning of the year, taking class every week and a newbie comes in, does mistakes and gets to choreograph with Lex.. Adding the fact that this dance club has a reputation of being extremely competitive.. I felt like i terpijak people's heads and got upgraded.. Maybe I am thinking too much but its kinda true..

Honestly i am terrified if i don't meet with the standards.. I would be letting Lex down and everyone else too..

Another thing is I manage to get in the performance dance without going through auditions and castings.. I really hope its because I manage to reach the required level and not because of my long close friendship with Lex..

Just a little rant..
Been really busy lately..
Happy Thursday everyone!