Friday 20 December 2013

413 : Is it okay to go out with your Ex?

Ex or someone you have dated before.

A huge debate sparked when puppy subtly expressed his unapproved when I told him I was going out with someone I had dated before. He decided to post a status on twitter saying how he is not okay with it rather than telling me directly, that annoyed me. What pissed me off that he did it only after I had told him I was going to sleep. So was I suppose to wake up, read it and feel like shit early in the morning??

So is it okay to date someone you dated before or your ex?

What most people say : Its your history together.

Nic says as well that you'll never know if the spark will ignite again, and god knows what will happen if the spark actually catches flame huh?

But to me, an ex is an ex. History is HISTORY. The reason you broke up will always be there and its enough to remind you why the flame was put out in the first place. Isn't it a waste to lose friends that way as well? - in fear that you might like someone again you completely block him off.

Don't keep love grudges. When it all comes down to it, real or not, they made you feel like you were the top of the world at one point of time. Isn't that what is life about, to gather memories to reflect on your remaining hours.

Insecurity is a put off. The first few times it happens, its cute, people say the only reason they are insecure is that they love you and they are afraid to lose you but seriously, after that it just gets annoying, that every person you go out with will be scrutinized and filtered. Isn't being together for 9 months saying something?..

I find it unfair as well, that puppy goes out with his ajay friends all the time and I don't say anything but the first friend I was going out with almost two weeks since I got back sparked such a huge argument between us. It feels like he can go out with anyone and I can't.

So guess who isn't going to meet up with anyone now?

All my friends are gone overseas, either UK or Australia, most people that didn't leave the country are busy with their own lives now. Everyone goes out of each other leaving you to feel like a third party to the whole group and a parasite to the friend you are closes to, them having to explain inside jokes and save you from an awkward situation or if you don't have one, it just leaves you sitting there drinking water while everyone talks about their own things.. Pitiful feeling it is..  Maybe ex's are really interested in meeting given our past relationships only..
I don't know...

Life back home is hell boring.. I'm dying to go back to Melbourne.. =(

Leonut

4 comments:

  1. ok or not to date an ex is not the point if you ask me. just be happy to do what you want to do. life's too short to be worried about what people thinks. what is important is that you do what you think is right.

    and in the case of puppy not being happy, you should take it as an opportunity to talk things through. try to understand the reasons why he tweeted what he tweeted. was it due to his insecurity? was it due to his concern for you? the energy that drives his action can be manifold. understand it first. if it is the first, you should allay his fears and assure him about it. if it is the latter, also, you need to assure him you can manage things. common to both is that you matter to him. and if you think it that way, wasn't he so sweet?

    :-)

    hope you've been well.

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  2. Sigh... you can go meet whoever the hell you want, he doesn't have a leash on you.... Ask him to listen to Gwen Stefani's Cool....

    On another note, meet me meet me!! Don't think he'll have a problem with that right hahaha... Pretty busy this month.... so Jan yeah :P

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  3. bubu and i didnt really break up in a way but we have both moved on, so.. it would be heart pounding to go out with him knowing that we still have feelings for each other, well at least my part, when im already with someone else.. haha...

    does that make sense?

    and relationship is all about trust, and honesty.. and if your love is strong, there is nothing to worry :) yes i will get jealous but i know in the end he is not gonna do anything with the other guy, but i cant say what the ex would do to him tho... lol..

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  4. Honestly, he is your boyfriend and even if he expresses disapproval it is his means of caring. Address it. Your boyfriend has a problem. Talk to him, work it out, make him feel secure. A secure boyfriend wouldn't act like this. I'm not saying you're at fault but as his boyfriend, you can do this for him. Even if it comes at a personal cost to yourself.. after all, isn't that what love is about?

    Of course, there is a limit to everything. Just ask yourself if he is worth it :)

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