239 : Dead give away

 What gives you away?
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During Wonfu Production in Lakeside few months ago, i met a few new people while sitting in line, waiting to go in to the hall. B and his habit of saying hi to random people, he just said hi to the people behind us and we became friends, one of which was a guy which i had alot of mutual friends with. After wongfu, we were just normal friends, occasionally replying each other's tweets.

Suddenly today, he gave me his number and we started whatsapping.. He was being abit flirtatious but i just dismissed it as a really opened guy. I have a few straight friends that flirt with me for fun. Anyways, the point when he said he wanted to rub my butt.. I was like "what?...". So i asked  really indirectly and got a conformation that he is bi..

The curious thing is that he knew i was gay.. He said i gave him a vibe and the way i replied his tweet was very "Gay-friendly" as i don't show disgust or discomfort when he says something flirtatious. I always thought it was a bromance thing..

I can't tell the difference with a bromance and a guy that i thought was straight flirting.. lol..

Anyways, the only thing that i remember giving me away was once when i was in form 4, i would act really differently when people are talking about this guy. A friend picked up on it and confronted me.. Besides that i guess would be this case where i was to comfortable with bromance.. The other time was the hotel room incident where the guy just took a chance saying he was only 60% sure..
Maybe lots of people suspect too?..

So im wondering, is there something about you that gives you away? I'm just curious..
And those that take chances.. I salute you..

Love,
Leonut

238 : Power!

*Original context removed*

Please don't assume what i say and build statements on it, I am partially at fault for not specifying the context of what i was trying convey, that point i would admit. 

Yes, sexuality is not sway-able at the core in the sense of a straight person is straight and a gay person is gay. However, what about the bisexuals?. I do believe there is a sense of bi-curious in people and many of which people are not clear of what they want till a certain age, mostly after marriage. Influenced by the media that a woman is the only partner a man is to choose and likewise with a woman choosing a man as her partner in life, people make choices by peer pressure.

Take the husband of the reality TV star Fran Drescher for an example, Peter Marc Jacobson. Happily married for years, good sexual life and still he came out as gay. A person who says "I am straight" may no necessary mean that person is straight, it might be mere clouded understanding of their preference.

The "change", i refer to is by towards the bi-curious population, not the absolute example population. I have heard stories of guys who are "straight" with gay men, not as a medium to release sexual tension but a deep sense of care and love towards the man despite having a wife or a girfriend. Would you count that as a myth or legend just because its "impossible to change sexuality"?.  I will not go on explaining the theory that i had previously mention as it is after all, not mine to talk about.

The world is a huge place. Close to a 7B population. The world keeps spinning everyday, who is to say what is impossible?

Anways, the LGBT community always have my full support, now and always.

Leonut! =)

P.s I never once said i go around telling people to orient the way i want. 
P.s.s. I am truly sorry if i offended anyone with the post. If you have read my blog long enough, you would understand when my posts are a joke and when they are serious. I shall select my words more carefully in the future.
P.s.s.s. Did you know Sir. Elton John's partner is gay?? LOLOL Just kidding!!~ =P

237 : The moment.

There comes a moment in life..
When everything seems to be falling apart,
Breaking, and shattering into fragments,
Family, friends, studies, life..
All too quickly to be fixed..
The rush to join the pieces together begin,
secretly praying that you will have a memory of what the picture looks like,
hoping you can restore it to its original form..

But futile efforts made,
you know its impossible.
Bits and pieces stolen away by people or too small to be noticed.
What remains, or rather, what you manage to structure with the remains,
looks deform and unfamiliar..
You begin to take up that form..
Changing to an almost completely different person without notice..

During the day you just wonder and question yourself in confusion..

"What have i changed into?"
"What made me become like this?"..

Here i am looking at the constantly shifting moon through my window.
It's beauty halfed from what it was merely days ago when Venus appeared..
So quickly it changed but a fact knowing it will regain its beauty and turn full again exist.
The moon, a beacon at night.
Storing the millions love letters lovers wished upon the moon, hoping their beloved claims it..

I need to stand up again..
The loneliness and emptiness here is eating me alive..
Uncontrollable tears just flow as i recall past memories that once made me smile.

How do i stand up again?..
How?..

Leonut..

236 : Dream Disclosure.

I sat at the five-foot way overlooking the roads.
I don't know where i was or why i was there but it felt right sitting there..
A sense of comfort and warmth unknowing why.
There wasn't anyone around me though..
I was alone..

Suddenly a car pulled up few feet in front of me.
A family of 3 appeared from the right and was heading towards the car.
And i could recognize the boy with them..

It was Lex.. Wearing the neon blue shirt he wore on his profile picture.
Looking dashing as usual..
He noticed me siting there and waved to me.
His family was brought to awareness from the wave and made their way towards me.

"What you doing sitting there?", they asked me.

"Just sitting here.. Just done shopping?", i replied them.

"Yea, going home now. See you soon!", Lex said with a smile.

The whole family made their way towards the car. As his parents were getting in the car. He ran back towards me. I stood up in confusion.

He stopped right in front of me , wearing the usual smile i grew familiar with. He dint say anything. He tap his cheek twice and instantly i knew what he wanted.. A kissed him on the cheek and he hugged me..

The next thing i knew, i was covered with sweat.. I looked around.. I was in my room.. Less then 10'C and i'm sweating.. I took my phone.. 1.32am..

Just a dream.. I grabbed my shark, curl into the fetus position and went back to sleep..

Rest of the night was filled with nightmares.. Dreamed i was chased, hunted and stabbed by mutilated figures.. Each time waking up in sweat again..

Dreams.. Do they mean anything?..

Leonut..

235 : Cutest Gesture

Exams over!!!
Okay.. I apologize for those people that actually know me in real life to be reading this..
Just remembered something that I've experienced before..

___________________________________________

He pulled me closer towards him..
My back leaning against his chest, his hands curled around me.
He reach forward and kissed me.
Pulses of pleasure and satisfaction surged through me as his hands wrap tighter around me.
Exchange of saliva and soon, we were both shirtless before continuing.

He made an advancement down and slowly unbuttoned my jeans.
Pulling my jeans off with the most mischievous smile, i couldn't help but to just smile back, unaware of what i was going to expect next..

He got up, folded my shirt and jeans properly, placed them neatly on a chair and then only coming back to me...

I was literally stun..
What a cute thing to do!!

A gentleman on bed too? Haha.
After everything he did another thing which just made me giggle and laugh.

Folding the clothes and putting them aside, honestly the cutest non-sexual gesture i have seen ever...

Lol, anyone else has any cute gestures that you seen or did before?

Love,
Leonut

234 : Exam Fucks!

I'm suppose to stop blogging a while but something happened today that just annoyed the hell out of me.

First paper, i was.. fairly ready?
Was calm in the exam hall. The number of seats was really breathtaking!
I was allocated a seat under an air vent blowing hot hair. I got used to the sound but i couldn't hear the last announcement out of the multiple housekeeping rules due to it. An invigilator came over and handed me the question booklet. Exam started and i started answering the questions.

Throughout the whole exam the girl beside me was sleeping!!! I don't know why but i just got distracted by her. She honestly never even lifted her pen! Not a single word written. I think it was the way i was comfortable sitting that i can see her movements at the corner of my eye. I seriously cannot stand people sleeping through an exam. Parents paid so much money for course fees and you just sleep it away even through the exams?? Pft!


Then it happened.
2 hours into the exam, 5 questions down and 3 more to go, i decided to take a 10 seconds break. I put down my pen and look around. Then i started to notice something.. Everyone had alot of papers on their tables.. It was weird.. I looked around and realize something.. HOLY FUCK!! I'm one paper short!!! And i dont even know what paper is that! Question paper?? Instruction sheet?? I quickly raise my hand and the same invigilator that gave me the question booklet came over. She seemed nice, an old women in her late 50's wearing pink.. HELL I WAS WRONG!! A fucking Dolores Umbridge in her bitchy flesh!!

I felt like slapping her!!

Excuse me madam, I really sorry but i was looking around and realize everyone has another sheet of paper with a logo on top. I didn't get that sheet of paper.
 
You didn't get it?

No I did not.

That can't be! I put one in every booklet.

No, I honestly did not get it.

Are you sure?

Yes i am!

Well, did you not listen to announcements?

I'm really sorry but i couldn't hear it clearly just now and the exams started.

You should have raised your hand earlier, the exams are more then half way over! I shall go talk to the senior advisers and let you know. Maybe they will come over to talk to you later.

Okay, is it important by the way?

Of course it is!

The whole time i was talking to her she was just smiling. She kept insisting she gave me the paper. What? I hid the paper and asked for another one??? Dumb bitch!! And then she walked away like nothing happened and came back 10 mins later with the paper.

Here is the paper. You have less then one hour left to complete the whole exam and this too. Good luck!~

And again!! With the stupid happy tone and smile!! WHAT THE FUCK?? I literally started panicking! My whole body started to shiver and my mind just went blank. 1 more hour for 3 questions and what ever shit was on that paper and all because she "gave" me the paper!! My time allocation gone and i just started scribbling every crap i could for the last 3 questions.

The whole time in my mind was "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!! THERE GOES MY HD!! MY ONLY CHANCE OF A HD AND THERE! GONE CAUSE OF HER!!"

I ended finishing the paper 10 mins before the end time and i opened the paper. "Replacement for question 2". WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

I just shut the paper and nearly cried..
I just read the paper but my mind was blank.. and i didn't change a single thing on my answer..

Sat there till time was over and handed up my paper.
When i was packing to leave, dolores walked by and gave me a smirk..

FUCK YOU BITCH!!

Leonut!
  

233 : M.I.A

Gonna be missing in action till end of next week due to exams..
Haven't been studying well though..
Getting distracted for some reason...

For one thing is that someone has been appearing in my dreams a lot lately and its knocking me out of my focus from the second i wake up till the moment i sleep  and not in a good way.. I was thinking about him, thinking bout me, thinking bout us, what we gonna be, open my eyes, it was only just a dreeaaammm!~~~

Lol! anyways, hopefully the studying mood will kick in..
Can't afford to fail anything and yet i foresee just shit ass results..

I was lucky i manage to get a good enough result for college to get to Australia with all the worst type of distraction and all.. Pray i would be able to pull another miracle..

Wish me luck..

Leonut..
Will still be tweeting though. :)