Sunday, 21 April 2013

371 : I'm jealous?

Is this call jealousy?

The sudden frustration I always feel when you mention his name.
The fact that he is spending so much time with you when you guys just met.
Am I allowed to feel annoyed?

Every single day there would be a mention of you by him or him by you, either directly or indirectly.
I know you both have nothing on but its just such a kill joy when you tell me about him. Just the happiness i have when i talk to you disappears completely.

I'm closer to him than you are but...
I don't know what i'm feeling.
I just want to stop talking to both of you when you tell me stuff about him and vice versa.
If you both are so close just talk to each other!

Jealous you all are going out so often and i'm stuck here alone?
That he stopped talking to me and is instead talking to you?
That he is giving you gifts and i'm getting nothing?

What the hell is wrong with me?..
Maybe i'm just this stupid selfish fucker that don't want to be only unhappy one six thousand miles away.
I seriously need to get over this..
I better go back to studying.

Ryan, please don't say anything.
I still want to post things here as an outlet, not as a news report to puppy or anyone i know personally. 


  1. This is the LDR...thingy right ?

    I think the right thing to do now is to focus on studying...

  2. Focus study and the rest well just go with it although its a little tough. :)