After almost 21 years, I realize something, I never liked to be in the spotlight of people, at least not deliberately. I would never know how to act, smile till my face twitch? or scan around for a spot to stare at?
I remember a few years back when my class sang happy birthday to me I nearly died of awkwardness, I just stared down on the floor the whole time wishing "happy birthday" had 2 verse instead of 4. I can see however, my friends aren't victim to this social awkwardness.
Few days ago during a party we sang happy birthday to a friend, her reaction?
She proceeded to jump off a chair to the middle of the room, did the muscle biceps pose with her thumbs pointing at herself, nodding her head up and down with a 'yeah bitches, its my birthday, sing to me' expression. Freaking, Epic.
On the same party, a group of friends bought gifts for me as a thank you for choreographing and training them for a dance production. Other choreographers cried, some cheered with friends, me?
Could it be that I have this awkwardness due to the fact that I've never really celebrated my birthday before, maybe twice at most. I seldom get gifts and all as well. I'm still learning..
Speaking of spotlights, on stage however, I LOVE THE SPOTLIGHT! That feeling of 'Yea bitches! All eyes on me!' is one form of spotlight I love! I guess most dancers live for that feeling, the adrenaline rush, that moment where your whole world disappears and all you know is you are on stage, the music and beat is echoing through the whole theater, and your body goes into autopilot when muscle memory kicks in. Pure bliss!
Anyways, after 2 hectic weeks of practices, the performance of the year is over, leaving most of us with post-depression, refreshing the social media every few minutes hoping videos get posted or pictures get uploaded.. Performed shirtless on stage, what a new experience.. =P
Till next time,
Love,
Leonut
I remember a few years back when my class sang happy birthday to me I nearly died of awkwardness, I just stared down on the floor the whole time wishing "happy birthday" had 2 verse instead of 4. I can see however, my friends aren't victim to this social awkwardness.
Few days ago during a party we sang happy birthday to a friend, her reaction?
She proceeded to jump off a chair to the middle of the room, did the muscle biceps pose with her thumbs pointing at herself, nodding her head up and down with a 'yeah bitches, its my birthday, sing to me' expression. Freaking, Epic.
On the same party, a group of friends bought gifts for me as a thank you for choreographing and training them for a dance production. Other choreographers cried, some cheered with friends, me?
I hid behind my friend for a clear minute, hugging him so he wouldn't run away, trying my best to get away from that situation where all eyes were on me.. When they actually manage to pry both of us apart, I was surprised with flowers, dancing shoes and a card with thanks. Words cannot describe that feeling! I just wanted to hug them and never let go! I was blushing so much!
Could it be that I have this awkwardness due to the fact that I've never really celebrated my birthday before, maybe twice at most. I seldom get gifts and all as well. I'm still learning..
Speaking of spotlights, on stage however, I LOVE THE SPOTLIGHT! That feeling of 'Yea bitches! All eyes on me!' is one form of spotlight I love! I guess most dancers live for that feeling, the adrenaline rush, that moment where your whole world disappears and all you know is you are on stage, the music and beat is echoing through the whole theater, and your body goes into autopilot when muscle memory kicks in. Pure bliss!
Anyways, after 2 hectic weeks of practices, the performance of the year is over, leaving most of us with post-depression, refreshing the social media every few minutes hoping videos get posted or pictures get uploaded.. Performed shirtless on stage, what a new experience.. =P
Till next time,
Love,
Leonut
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