311: Hibby Jibbies

Happy Halloween Everyone!
I personally love Halloween, get to dress up and all. Just too bad Malaysians seldom celebrate it for the fun of it.

I previously typed out a ghost encounter that happened to my mum during her labor period in the hospital. You know how pregnant women are prone to "unclean" encounters especially in the hospital? Well yea.. My mum had a really bad experience. But i think i shall keep family stories to family.

Anyways, exams are here, everyone is busy mugging.
I missed the big Halloween clubbing party due to an exam, curse the early papers..
Bohoo..

Oh!
Tadaa!! 

Look what i got?
Awesome no?

Was suppose to be my Halloween "costume", what better day to wear on a FAKE industrial piercing. Lol.
But nah.. I shall keep it for special occasions!

Exams exams exams, no time for anything.. =/

Happy Halloween!
Candies and tricks!
Leonut

310 : Once bitten, Twice shy, Trice?

Exams are here..
Studying through the late night when the my phone whatsapp notification rang..

Penguin..

Someone i never expected to hear from..
Its been almost 7 months since i last talked to him..

He didn't sound like his happy self he used to be, the "..." at the back of each sentence sent to my phone which set a sad tone for the whole conversation.

He watched Wong Fu's "The Last". I guess that video served it's purpose.
Who, What, When, Where, Why, triggering every memory of loving and loss a person could have, or rather what they wished to have..

He told me he did something stupid, where he lost someone he really loved, that he was scared he wouldn't be accepted again..

______________________

The boy you talked to me about, the boy studying abroad in Melbourne, the boy you hurt so badly, breaking his heart in every way possible. I know it's not me.. I wouldn't be, and i would never be..
Everything you made me believe last time was never what it seemed.. The person you told me you loved was someone else when i was with you.. I actually believed it was me.. It was foolish of me..
A lot of people told me you are a mean person, where you go around breaking people's hearts.. But hey, see it in another way.. Everyone is just finding that right person, and you are too. I guess people just fall deeper for you than you for them..
Penguin..
I know you can make it up to him.. Good luck..
Lots of Love... 
Leonut.

309 : Why i'm scared.

Well basically, as long as in can remember, i always had a fear of people's boyfriends. I never knew why, or never put much thought into it.

So today, i had the sudden urge to talk to honey bunny, its been weeks since i last talk to him and all. Miss him. But as i wanted to hit send on whatsapp i deleted the message.. then it hit me! i realize the problem and the cause of my fear. Lets have a story telling session.

°◦°◦◦~~~°◦°◦◦o◦◦°◦°~~~◦◦°◦°

Long long time ago.
*water ripples on your constructed imaginary image arriving to a flashback along with harp music*


When i was still a young, naive form 2 little boy, i had a close girl friend, i had many more close friends but we shall focus on this young girl for now.

One day, she got into a relationship with a form 3 guy which was one of the cutest guy in school. Narrow slanty eyed, refined jaw line, charming smile type of guy. That time, i wasn't interested in guys yet so i never bother about him. I still remained close to her. During lunch and break, i often would be talking with her when he had his prefect duties on.

Like every fairy tale in my book, they broke up months after. He told her he had feelings for someone else. She changed after that, who wouldn't? After that we drifted apart.

One day in form 4, 2 years later, a friend of mine told me the real reason they broke up. Apparently i was spending too much time with her, and he was really uncomfortable with that thus the break up. It was a stupid reason of course. What? The dormant whore'mones in me ain't gonna do anything that time..

So yea, in my fairytale, without knowing it, i was the villain. Of course he was a sensitive bitch, at least he could have let me know. I still took it quite badly when i found out.. Felt horrible that i was partially responsible for their break up..

That day on i always had a kinda fear of people's boyfriends.. =/

The end.

°◦°◦◦~~~°◦°◦◦o◦◦°◦°~~~◦◦°◦°

Didn't message honey bunny in the end. I'm sure he is fine and well. As for me, i'm still bumped about some pass events but oh well. Don't know why i became so high after an emo session in the morning. Lols~

Caution on what you do always~
Love,
Leonut!

308 : Gay's Pride

No, not a sexuality celebration, but the prides of gay people.
I know I want to say but I have no idea how to word it.. lol

I don't know is it only me but gay people that are really obviously gay i meet always just come of as extremely unfriendly. Maybe its because they hang out with girls more or they sense me as a plu, each time i talk to them they just give this really unfriendly vibe like 'why is this person talking to me' type. Everyone that talks to them including straight guys, they are just as friendly as ever but me i will get that death stare. People says its because I haven't got to get to know them yet but hell! how do you get to know someone with that deathstare?? No, its not only one person but already a number of them.

Of course they won't add you on facebook, and when you add them on facebook too, they won't accept. My face problem la.
Then there is another issue of people that don't bother replying messages or just says 'I'm busy' 24/7.

The Plu circle around me is just depressing..
Times like this is where i get this really really rare feeling of wishing i was born differently, so i wouldn't have put up with this all the time..
I'm just fucking pathetic no?

307 : Back to Reality

".. and dancers on stage"

Each of us walk out on to the pitch dark stage, using the countless practices before to navigate ourselves to our positions. We crouching down, and waited..

The music starts.

The strong speakers send pulses and vibrations across the stage and the theater, each beat sending a signal through us, to our eardrums and sensors. Everyone stays still, counting silently to ourselves, the tension builds.

"5, 6, 7, 8.. Te Dum!"

Everyone springs into life, blinders flash, spot lights turn on and a colour wash fills the background. Each dancer moving to our coordinated steps, building the vision our choreographer had intended for our piece. I looked forward to the audience, and the rest was muscle memory.
Before I knew it, we were taking our bows, partying on the stage and the curtains closed.

__________________________________________________________

3 days of awesome performances with friends are finally over.
Back to reality that exams are approaching like a meteor to the dinosaur ages.
No more using dance as an excuse, bohoo!

Enjoy your Sunday!
Leonut

306 : Cuddle buddy wanted!

Another application sign up sheet since the Boyfriend application posted a while ago went so well, with tones of imaginary mails just pilling in and flooding my cobweb infested mailbox ..

Here's a cuddle buddy application!

Sign          
up
            now! 

Cuddle outfit and cuddle position must be filled out in as much detailed as possible.

Just fill in the form and submit it!

Honestly, who doesn't love a good cuddle under the blankets?

Please and thank you!
Leonut

305 : Respect

Respect used to be associated with age, but not anymore.
The younger generation aren't push arounds anymore.

"Respect must be earned" - A line which i been hearing again and again.

I respect everyone, younger and older, as a human being.
If you are high and important, fine. Automatically you gain my respect, you must be went through a lot of shit to get to where you are now, but when you expect people to worship you? Get off your stupid fantasy land please.

During a lecture, another lecturer came in and took 10 mins of the lecture time to talk about the importance of Econometrics for our future. Being the last week of university before exams, some people left the lecture when she started her talk. The lecturer stopped her talk, glared at them leaving and said "Well, we don't have to compete with them for a job in the future". Like wtf?

Yes, i agree that what she was saying was important, but for her to put herself to a point where she insult students when they are leaving? Bitch! Its university, not highschool! Lower your stupid ego bitch, you aren't absolute key to our future. She told us that she will be only taking 10 mins of our time but she was still talking after 15 mins. That point, a student did something that no one expected.

"Excuse me, i know what you are saying is important and all, but this is our last lecture for revision, you come in here saying you would take 10 mins but its 15 mins and you aren't even close to finishing. We need our revision, exams are 2 weeks away."

The look on the lecturers face, priceless.

Similarly, people like my uncle. Does all the crap in the world and expect me to respect him. If you won't talk to my mum when she talks to you, don't expect me to respect you no matter how many things you bring over.

Realize everyone gets medium respect initially to me. Shake my hand with a firm hand straight, gain full respect, shake my hand like a jellyfish, i would slap you like a jellyfish*.

All that being said, some young people still need to learn how to respect people. Its common courtesy such as don't talk when someone else is talking, listen to when people are talking, face them when they are talking, let the older people board the train first, understand not everyone is born 'normal' and such.

Rant rant rant,
Busy week!
Leonut