Sunday 27 May 2012

228 : Rejection

The feeling of rejecting someone..
The feeling of telling someone things you know will hurt him..
The feeling of seeing his smile change to a frown..

I am really really not good at this..
It fucking sucks to see someone so sad because of what i am saying..
What i am conveying to him..

I feel like crying..

21 comments:

  1. At the end of the day, you will need to be honest to yourself and to him.

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  2. Cry you will, but stand up again you shall.

    Dont worry too much k?

    =)

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  3. at least u will learn that rejection hurts both parties, not just one side

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    1. Not to alot of people.. They just reject without any feelings..

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  4. It's never easy to put someone down... okay that's not always true... it is sometimes easy to put people down... but I suppose it's never easy when they are somebody you know. Worse when they are somebody who cares for you. But honestly speaking. What else can you do? What else is there left for you to do? Absolutely nothing. There's NOTHING else you can do (short of leading him on and being with him to 'spare his feelings' but that's another can of worms we shall leave closed indefinitely I hope) so all you NEED to do is tell yourself that this is what you HAVE to do. DO it. And forget all about it knowing that you done what simply MUST be done. No sense wasting tears or battered emotions over it. If it is any consolation, he's probably feeling worse than you do. So if you MUST fret over something, focus instead on how you can help him get over it instead of how miserable you feel because of how miserable you made him feel. Proactive, always. Not reactive.

    Also (and I'm just pointing out the giant elephant in the metaphorical room) this could probably have been avoided if you were more clear/specific with him from the start. AND if you did make it very clear from the start and he juts would not listen. Well, then it's really his own fault that he's feeling this way anyway so why worry? Just saying.

    cheeers

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    1. Thanks cyren..

      And no, i never did lead him on, i told him from the very very start i am not interested. But he still went on with it. And yesterday after everything he told me "No matter what.. I will get you one day, you will be my first and last.". Which is sweet in a way but i really dont know how to reply.. :(

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    2. YEAH... I guess it's kinda sweet... in a stalkerish over-obsessed maybe-you-should-be-more-weirded-out sort of way... personally I think he's just being unfair and totally uncool. Like... you like someone so much that you're not willing to

      1. Accept it when the object of your affection says "no"
      2. Seriously consider the feelings and preferences of the object of your affection.

      Errrh... not a very good way to start a relationship.

      BUT anyway, honesty is always the best policy. And since he doesn't seem to understand subtle tone honesty you need to give him the other kind. Change your tone of voice. Be extremely blunt. Or something. Drastic. Usually does the trick. Sure he may end up feeling that you're a snobbish bitch but... well, what are the alternatives, really? Besides, I'm sure you're doing everyone involved a favor and (hopefully) he will see this someday when (more likely, if) he (ever?) matures.

      If that still doesn't work, try exasperation or frustration instead. And then finally the cold shoulder for a couple of days followed by a "If you're NOT going to listen to a word I say and disrespect my wishes, well I don't even want to talk to you anymore!" as a response to what I'm sure will be his mountainload of texts.

      Remember, you may not be actively encouraging his advances, but when people are in love (or at least infatuated) they will delude themselves into seeing things. Erhm... I'm sure you know what I mean.

      cheers.

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    3. Just hate it when people don't understand that "no" means "no". "I'm not interested in you that way" does not mean "Try harder!" or "Keep following me around, maybe I will change my mind". =.=

      GODDESS HELP US!!!

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    4. Lol, i was quite blunt to him over skype. But was still quite bumped to see him sad la.. I'm not the rejecting type of person i guess. And yes, he told me he is going to try harder, but his tweets says otherwise.. Feel bad la.. >.<

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  5. Hmm..but deep down you know it's for the best right? Hugs!!

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  6. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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    1. Yea him. I remove your comment nanti people know.. >.<

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  7. u tell him cos u care about him..
    or else u'll let the thing drag and he'll hurt more when u tell him later.
    cheers :)

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    1. Will use that advice.
      Thanks Danny. :D

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  8. Yeah what everyone said above is right...

    And I'm gonna use my classic line which I've mentioned a gazillion times on my blog and comments that it's bordering on abuse: 'Time heals everything'.

    No matter how shitty things are right now, your heart will heal, and so will his.

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    1. Haha, cliche advices used a gazillion times are used because they are true.
      I'm in the mercy of time now. :D

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