Wednesday 24 October 2012

309 : Why i'm scared.

Well basically, as long as in can remember, i always had a fear of people's boyfriends. I never knew why, or never put much thought into it.

So today, i had the sudden urge to talk to honey bunny, its been weeks since i last talk to him and all. Miss him. But as i wanted to hit send on whatsapp i deleted the message.. then it hit me! i realize the problem and the cause of my fear. Lets have a story telling session.


°°~~~°°o°°~~~°°

Long long time ago.
*water ripples on your constructed imaginary image arriving to a flashback along with harp music*


When i was still a young, naive form 2 little boy, i had a close girl friend, i had many more close friends but we shall focus on this young girl for now.

One day, she got into a relationship with a form 3 guy which was one of the cutest guy in school. Narrow slanty eyed, refined jaw line, charming smile type of guy. That time, i wasn't interested in guys yet so i never bother about him. I still remained close to her. During lunch and break, i often would be talking with her when he had his prefect duties on.

Like every fairy tale in my book, they broke up months after. He told her he had feelings for someone else. She changed after that, who wouldn't? After that we drifted apart.

One day in form 4, 2 years later, a friend of mine told me the real reason they broke up. Apparently i was spending too much time with her, and he was really uncomfortable with that thus the break up. It was a stupid reason of course. What? The dormant whore'mones in me ain't gonna do anything that time..

So yea, in my fairytale, without knowing it, i was the villain. Of course he was a sensitive bitch, at least he could have let me know. I still took it quite badly when i found out.. Felt horrible that i was partially responsible for their break up..

That day on i always had a kinda fear of people's boyfriends.. =/

The end.

°°~~~°°o°°~~~°°

Didn't message honey bunny in the end. I'm sure he is fine and well. As for me, i'm still bumped about some pass events but oh well. Don't know why i became so high after an emo session in the morning. Lols~

Caution on what you do always~
Love,
Leonut!



19 comments:

  1. Its not your fault... He's too stupid or smart to put the blame on other people... other than that, maybe the person who told you that just made that up...

    As long as you are happy =D

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    1. i agree with j. don't let you be the excuse for people's insecurities...

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    2. Haih, damage already done, truma already caused.. lol

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  2. And in another set of fairytale ending, whereby you are not the villain. You wished to live happily ever after with the cutest guy in school ?

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    Replies
    1. lol, at the end of the day.. that guy isn't cute to me.. Haha

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  3. It is always awkward to hang out with couples sometimes.

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    Replies
    1. Not sometimes la.. Like you said, ALWAYS! haha

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  4. Wow this incident must have messed with your psyche, especially since it occurred during the teenage years, those are the sensitive and formative years which determines most of our character and core values, in addition to family influence of course...

    It's not your fault, but it's also a delicate type of situation.. If you watch How I Met Your Mother, it's kind of like the situation where Ted has failed in so many relationships because of Robin's presence in their gang, and how they remain close friends. Factor in Barney (who also dated Robin) into that, and the whole dynamic of the gang and the friends vs. boyfriend/girlfriend thing is just uber complicated and head splitting... Guess it depends on the individual, whether or not your friend's bf can handle your presence..


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    1. Yea, i guess that made an impact on me that i never knew it could.

      My god la you jboy.. Relate until macam ini.. I remember that part.. but not really sure how that relates... =/
      Exam stress, my brain damn blur now..

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  5. O.o I just wrote topic like this. Luckily, I still haven't casued any of my besties break up becasue of the closeness with them. However, I'm very sure the boyfriends really don't like my existence in my besties' life =.= Got one really think I'm a threat to him......but he doesn't know my bestie should be the one worry..Hahahaha

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    1. This makes me woner if we still in closet better keep distance with girlfriends? Do you still encounter something like this anymore?

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    2. Why do you say so that your friend's boyfriend don't like you?

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    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    4. Erm..long story. Go to my blog..I wrote it before

      http://themasks9630.blogspot.com/2012/10/straight-guys-enemy-sad.html

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  6. Definitely not your fault. The guy is a coward for not asking you or his gf about this.

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  7. That was so unfortunate. I hang out with the girls a lot too but I never has been seen as a threat.

    Maybe because I have no market value in their boyfriend's eyes LOLs.

    Or people can easily assume I am gay haha.

    But in seriousness, I really can't thought the logic for the guy to break because of you.

    Two explanation: 1) the girl talked a lot about you, with her boyfriend, which made the boyfriend so intimidated
    2)that friend made up that story.

    But it was not really a loss for that girl because she realized that her ex-boyfriend was not really into her.

    And for you, I guess moderation is the key. But you shouldn't blame yourself too much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Could be half of 1) and 2).. But i dunno la..

      And please, what market value. Not like i ada. lol

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  8. it'll be even funnier if he knows u have no intentions whatsoever to snatch his gf from him back then, lol. Too sensitive la, and u don't just break with ur loved ones just because they are close with other people la

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    Replies
    1. Everyone thinks she was hot also la.. Maybe thats why?

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