Thursday, 17 November 2011

110 : Last time

This shall be my last time I'm going to blog about emotional stuff..

Yes, i have not yet go.. Dreams just draw my heart closer to him, the body contact, the warmth.. everything just seems so real..
I wake up tearing..
I really really miss him.. secretly i wish the feeling is mutual..
I still do wonder if i did something wrong.. To have made his feelings towards me deplete so quickly..
Seeing him with R everyday just hurts more..
Even when i was with him, R was always there with us..
R likes KL.. He actually told me before my break up which makes everything more painful..

I need to let go..

I cant take it any longer, thought that we were stronger, all we do is linger, slipping through my fingers, I don't want to try now, all that's left is goodbye to find a way to tell you, i hate this part right here.. I'm sure you never mean to hurt me, but i never thought we fall out of place. I wish you never looked at me that way. I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing, when a heart breaks it don't break even. What am i suppose to say when I'm all choked up and you are okay, I'm falling to pieces.. Dear.. If i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with my and just forget the world? Forget what we are told, before we get too old, show me garden that is bursting full of life.. Never mind, i'll find someone like you... I wish nothing best for you too. Don't forget me, i think I'll remember you said, sometimes it last in love sometimes it hurts instead. In another life, I'll be your guy, we'll keep full our promises, it'll be us against the world. In another life, i would make you stay, so i don't have to say you are the one that got away. I hope you see right through my walls, i hope that you'll catch me because I'm already falling, you put your arms around me and I'm home.. Honestly, if you ask me, how I'm doing, I'll say I'm doing just fine, i'll lie and say that you aren't on my mind.. I still love you...

The soundtracks of my days...
I'll need time..
I'll recover..
Till then..


  1. And then again, I asked myself. If I break-up with a guy, do I find someone like him or someone better than him ?

    You shouldn't be thinking about this especially on your holidays.

  2. Give it time, you will heal.
    That's how the heart was designed to work :)

    And yeah you should be enjoying your holidays. Spend some time doing things YOU love. Some good old ME time is good for the soul ;)

  3. Awww come here sweetie. *hugs hugs*

    First, let me just say how much I LOVE your taste in music!!! Meanwhile, he's not the one. Someday your prince will come, someday you'll find his love. And how thrilling that moment will be, when the man of your dreams comes to be :)

    hang in there, and, if you need to talk about anything you know how to reach me :)


  4. ah take good care, i also feeling the same like you do ~~ huggies to you